crazyforge assemble! Mental health info sought

Discussion in 'The Red Room' started by oldfella1962, Jul 12, 2017.

  1. oldfella1962

    oldfella1962 the only real finish line

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    well the plot thickens. While she hasn't yet hallucinated in the facility so far, she is still strongly delusional (bizarre delusions having no basis in reality) and manic - happy for a few hours, upset and hostile the next few hours, rinse & repeat. During a recent phone call one minute she says she can't wait to be together again and we can hold each other then mere minutes later saying I better learn to get along with her or she will divorce me. :unsure: Her case worker was in the room the entire duration of the phone call, so she heard her delusions and rapid fire mood changes. And she's in a safe, structured, sheltered environment - if she were released today and the "real world" hits her full force what will happen? My whole life is on hold until she gets completely diagnosed with......whatever she is experiencing. That said I have to be on top of my mental/physical game to handle any new stress or curveballs that are no doubt coming my way - or how can I help her? So that's going to be my new focus during this period. Any advice on dealing with such a mental health issue is appreciated!
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  2. Dinner

    Dinner 2012 & 2014 Master Prognosticator

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    Help her by being there and making sure she knows you love her. Be her advocate with the health care companies and push them to make sure every resource possible is put on her case.

    That really is all you can do, I am afraid.
  3. Lanzman

    Lanzman Vast, Cool and Unsympathetic Formerly Important

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    Ask questions. Don't just swallow what the doctor(s) and other therapists say . . . this kind of thing amounts to educated guesswork, so make sure you keep the medical folks honest. They're going to want to prescribe drugs to even her out, and they may not properly consider interactions with other drugs she might be taking (you haven't said, so I don't know). In other words, you have to keep on top of the situation and not get complacent.
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  4. oldfella1962

    oldfella1962 the only real finish line

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    Thanks, I'm very much doing this. The doctors at her facility will not interact with her "hometown" doctors until they eventually fully discharge her & move her out to the next level/stage of treatment. Then the record of her visit will be discussed with our local hospital. But her long-term doctor here at Fort Gordon is in the information loop at least , and I put a copy of her power-of-attorney (so glad we did this about a year ago along with living wills, etc) into her medical records because this will be needed in her future care. All I can do is keep my fingers crossed for her eventual recovery, but I am braced for the worst of course. I am visiting her tomorrow and I hope it goes well. If not, I can at least get some boots-on-the-ground information on how "normal" she is acting amongst her delusional/manic behavior. Plus her friend she's known for ten years is coming with me as a "second set of eyes" so she can assess her level of normalcy and offer her insight. I'm trying to take the most scientific approach to this that I can.
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  5. oldfella1962

    oldfella1962 the only real finish line

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    Nobody will answer my specific medical questions - I'm only allowed to visit her in a room with the other patients & visitors for one hour, and staff are there to supervise & control the patients so there are no incidents. The facility doctors will not share confidential medical information even with other doctors (such as my wife's primary care provider for example). My wife's case manager says she doesn't have specific medical information - maybe she does, but can't or won't share it with me......who knows? But the next time I call the caseworker I will mention that I have her "power of attorney" and can bring a copy if that will make a difference. It could be security is super-tight for safety reasons, like prison or jail. But I would feel better if her actual doctors there communicated with me or at least my wife's doctor. Not saying mistakes will be made, but I am concerned because I'm so far away from her. Now I know (kinda sort of) how all the guys at work feel when their kids are in prison for a long time. :(
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  6. Lanzman

    Lanzman Vast, Cool and Unsympathetic Formerly Important

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    Yeah. My wife's doctors tried that shit with me and I wasn't having it. We had the power of attorney stuff too, and I wound up having to bash them over the head with it. Especially once I found out that the doctors weren't talking to each other and were prescribing drugs with potentially bad interactions. Now, my wife's issues were physical, not mental/emotionals (tho the physical stuff drove some emotional stuff) but the same principle applies.
  7. oldfella1962

    oldfella1962 the only real finish line

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    well I'm bring the power of attorney with me, and if traffic allows it I'll get there early and can try to make some headway into getting an information/communication link. Of course I'll be polite & respectful and speak in calm, measured tones so they don't think I'm unstable! :scary:
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  8. ed629

    ed629 Morally Inept Banned

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    It's been awhile, but years ago and had to deal with somebody who was also manic depressive and bipolar at times. I found out that sometimes you just have to step away from them, even if it's the last thing you want to do. If not you might just snap and lash out at them and make the situation at the time worse. So even though it might make you feel like a shit, just stepping away for a few minutes or for a few hours may be the best solution. You are dealing with someone who is not making rational decisions or having rational thoughts, and trying to discuss the issue is not going to lead anywhere except for fustration for you.
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  9. shootER

    shootER Insubordinate...and churlish Administrator

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    My maternal grandmother died in the 70s from what turned out to be a brain tumor. Aside from losing a tremendous amount of weight (she was a typical "plump grandma") she also had symptoms very similar to what you describe about your wife.
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  10. oldfella1962

    oldfella1962 the only real finish line

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    Fort Gordon did a CAT scan and an MRI (among other tests) but everything is negative so far as to a possible cause. I don't know what the head-shrinkers at the facility are diagnosing her with.
    Maybe I'll never know until they release her to the Fort Gordon/Augusta medical system. Regardless, she has something causing ridiculous bizarre delusions and manic mood swings and memory loss.
    What makes it hard is not being able to believe what she says because it could be her delusional version of reality - but not always. Some of her delusions are non-bizarre enough that they could be the truth. It's a complicated thing!
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  11. oldfella1962

    oldfella1962 the only real finish line

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    update - she was WAY worse this saturday compared to last saturday. :( She was yo-yoing from one subject to the next every 15 or 30 seconds or so. Pacing non-stop or leaving to go get a soda or whatever or take a break to calm herself down. She was rambling on and on speaking gibberish and bizarre delusions. Claiming people that could not possibly be in the facility were in there with her.
    She still can't read yet - she can't focus her thoughts long enough. She can't interact with anyone in a rational manner. Her emotions are all over the map. The staff can't form a diagnosis because they can't get a straight, non-fantasy/imagination answer out of her. She swears she's "better now" and can't understand why she can't come home.

    Thankfully no hallucinations, but her lost link to reality and spinning out of control mind are not a good sign at all. I feel helpless and hope they find a cause for this rapid mental decline. :(
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  12. tafkats

    tafkats scream not working because space make deaf Moderator

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    I know adult-onset psychotic disorders aren't unheard-of ... but that's about all I know.

    All I can suggest is to keep asking questions about everything, running everything any doctor says through your own "does this make sense" filter, and if it doesn't, to keep pressing until it does...
  13. Dinner

    Dinner 2012 & 2014 Master Prognosticator

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    Surely, the MRI would have picked up signs of a brain tumor though? I believe he said the doctors gave her an MRI.
  14. oldfella1962

    oldfella1962 the only real finish line

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    I'm asking questions but her caseworker cannot give me specific medical information. The process is a complete report will be sent to Fort Gordon (the hospital providing her normal day-to-day care prior to being transferred to the mental health facility) when she is discharged.
  15. steve2^4

    steve2^4 Aged Meat

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    Is anyone in her family bi-polar? This is accompanied by delusions of grandeur, hallucinations, speed talking, feelings of persecution to the point of paranoia. Bi-polar isn't just mood swings.

    5% or more of the population have this.

    They will be trying different drugs to assess what helps and develop a diagnosis. It takes time.
  16. oldfella1962

    oldfella1962 the only real finish line

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    Her case worker kind of hinted around about what the doctors might be doing as far as medications. The staff means to take a very much a "stay in your lane" approach: in other words the therapists have their role, the nurses have they role, the doctors have their role, etc. The case worker actually asked me if I had a list of what medications my wife was on already when she was admitted. Al this information was sent between the hospitals before she even arrived. The case worker wasn't even aware of this - wow. As I said her primary care provider here at home doesn't get any current information. All I knows is she was transferred to the facility and that's it.

    Anyway no history of bi-polar or schizophrenia in her family. So it's a real mystery as to what is going on in her mind. Al I know is she is getting worse for now. When she is discharged the facility has up to seven days to decide where she goes next (her next stage of getting help) so I will have to baby-sit her 24/7 because she can't be left alone since she's psychotic. I'm going to my human resources tomorrow to tel them that in the near future I will have to react to this and miss work for a week or so. So I'm basically in a "holding pattern" for an indefinite period of time.

    If she is beyond all hope of being sane again I'll have to see if Tricare (my insurance) pays for a "rest of her life" 24/7 resident mental facility or what.
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  17. steve2^4

    steve2^4 Aged Meat

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    They can't release her if she's a danger to herself or others. They won't be able to release her unless she has someplace to go. If you're not comfortable with her state at that time, don't agree to take her. They won't put her on the street. There should be some halfway-house type facility less intense than a mental hospital but this would be only after she's stable on drugs. There she would get therapy and have people to monitor her frame of mind.

    The drugs are very good. The problem is convincing the patient they need them especially if they don't "feel right" while on them.

    Many times a family history of mental health issues is unknown even to siblings. There are strong stigmas attached to this even today, but it was worse 30 years ago. Talk to her relatives, they may have information you're not aware of.

    As important, take care of yourself. The stress of a family member having a mental breakdown is high for anyone close to them.
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  18. oldfella1962

    oldfella1962 the only real finish line

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    yes the PHP (partial hospital program) they talked about is good. Therapy and education and counseling etc. during the day at a local mental health facility and she comes home at night. However she has to get to the level where she is cognizant of reality and able to comprehend the staff there. She is nowhere close to that level right now.

    And they talked about this being hard on families too, but keeping myself busy and trying not to over-think this (which can lead to worry) and not let it get to me.
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  19. LizK

    LizK Sort of lurker

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    Apply for FMLA now. make it intermittent not continuous. You can do several days in a row, then go back to work, but if you need to suddenly take off, you can
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  20. tafkats

    tafkats scream not working because space make deaf Moderator

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    I'm glad @LizK is here because she probably actually KNOWS this stuff, whereas I'm just guessing, but ... isn't that pretty much a terrible idea? Isn't everyone involved in your health care ideally supposed to work together as an integrated team, especially in a case like this where something is wrong and they don't quite know what it is yet?
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  21. LizK

    LizK Sort of lurker

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    Ideally all should be communicating and working with each other. In actuality, when a doctor acts like he wants to communicate with others on the case, we nurses get told "call dr and tell/ask" etc, all the while we nurses are trying to do patient care and pass messages. And then the second dr says to tell first dr something, or to call a third dr, ...
    The nurses try to be patient advocates, but there is only so much we can do.
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  22. oldfella1962

    oldfella1962 the only real finish line

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    yes, FMLA - that's the word I was thinking of that I need to bring up with my HR clerk. My supervisor mentioned it the day vacation leave ran out. Now is the time I will be needing it, and planned to see her tomorrow to tell her my situation.

    As for doctors, nurses, caregivers, etc. working together they might be (at the temporary facility) but I am unaware of it. Remember I can only be there 1 hour a week for patient visitation.
    The next hurdle will be getting that facility to communicate with Augusta/Fort Gordon and the third hurdle is everyone in Augusta/Fort Gordon to communicate, since there may different facilities/doctors involved.

    The good news is my wife called me a couple of hours ago - she was completely coherent and sane sounding. No wild delusional gibberish, and was well aware that I'm not in a position to take her home. She even joked about the children's toothpaste I brought her last week, and discussed specific things she wanted to do when she got released - all of them based in reality. She blames menopause still and "anger management" issues but these things have nothing to do with a break from reality, but that is for the staff to disc uss with me upon her release (whenever that is). But it is good to know that my "real" wife is still alive & well underneath the crazy version. :cool:
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  23. Dinner

    Dinner 2012 & 2014 Master Prognosticator

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    Honestly, it sounds like this place doesn't have their shit together and that the left hand doesn't know what the right hand is doing.
  24. Dinner

    Dinner 2012 & 2014 Master Prognosticator

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    How are your kids habdling everything?
  25. Lanzman

    Lanzman Vast, Cool and Unsympathetic Formerly Important

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    Exactly my concern about this. Sounds like you're doing the right thing tho, which is just to keep on top of the medical people and make sure information is being shared appropriately. From my uninformed layman's perspective, this whole deal is sounding more and more like some kind of infection. I presume the docs have done the usual bloodwork, including a white count and stuff? Maybe a tox screen wouldn't be a bad idea if they haven't already.
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  26. oldfella1962

    oldfella1962 the only real finish line

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    They are fine - my son is busy with his college classes and my daughter is busy with her very active two year old daughter (especially since her husband is deployed in the navy for a few more months)
    Physically my resting heart-rate is up about 15-20 percent but it could be because I didn't get a chance to exercise much during my vacation, so I'm slightly out-of-shape compared to a month ago.
    I'm fatigued a lot and could sleep ten hours a day if I could - I'm going to take a nap in a few minutes matter-of-fact.
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  27. Forbin

    Forbin Do you feel fluffy, punk?

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    The infection suggestion is interesting. What kind of infection would cause such delerium?
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  28. Lanzman

    Lanzman Vast, Cool and Unsympathetic Formerly Important

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    I'm thinking fungal, something that's upsetting brain chemistry. But again, I have NO medical knowledge beyond what I picked up at the dentist yesterday, so don't take me too seriously.
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  29. oldfella1962

    oldfella1962 the only real finish line

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    so your dentist gives you medical education? You're getting your money's worth! My family dentist only has three year old People Magazines in the waiting room. :brood:
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  30. steve2^4

    steve2^4 Aged Meat

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