But without the police, who will grab your tits when you're dead?

https://jezebel.com/lapd-officer-arrested-after-allegedly-groping-a-decease-1840413192

I'm surprised they actually punished him. Good on them, I guess.

She wanted it.

If she did not want it she would have risen from the dead and stopped him. It is clearly not a case of legitimate molestation.

Maybe there should be a necrophilia volunteer squad to molest the dead in case a regular cop cannot do their duty.

Law and order NMU (necrophelia molestation unit)

It sounds like a good spin off for pornhub. The only reason I suggest it is so I can go to patreon and force Brad Jones to review it.

Apparently he was charged with

which seems to imply there are situations whereby someone might have authority to engage in sexual contact with human remains....

Too soon!

I guess you need to leave options open from a legal standpoint.

ACAB

I can see the medical examiner and the mortician potentially needing to touch those parts on a corpse, so I'm guessing that's what they're referring to.

Coroners can feel up a body for science.

The dead female body has ways of shutting that whole thing down.

Obligatory "Was she hot?"

Actuality





And please tell me he was wearing this shirt.

I don’t know, that chick from Return of the Living Dead seemed pretty horny after turning into a zombie.

Linnea Quigly as Trash



That was a merkin she was wearing.

Likely, just seems an odd choice of terminology.

hmmm...reminds me of a sign at a business near my home: NO UNAUTHORIZED TRESPASSING

More like room temperature.

"So, where do I go to get a permit for..."

Is there a handbook for that?

Some years back there was a news story about a woman who was having to make the painful decision about pulling her husband off of life-support. She was lamenting to one of the medical personnel that her greatest regret was that they never had any children (IIRC, they were a young couple who hadn't been married for very long). The person she was talking to happened to grow up on a farm and knew that they had electrical devices to force animals to ejaculate, so they could collect semen for artificial insemination. That person suggested to her that it might be possible to modify one of the devices to fit her husband and collect a sample so that she could try IVF. She agreed, and as I recall, successfully conceived a kid. I believe there's a window of a couple of hours where after a man dies his semen is still viable and can be harvested for use in IVF. Technically, this would be considered "sexual contact," even though 99.9999999999% of people wouldn't consider it to be a fun time. Presumably, other people have done this as well.

There you have a reason. I am going to hope that reason is not used very often.

It's been done since the late 70s, so yeah a lot of people have probably used that method. The article's worth reading for this line alone

This I did not know....

You realise how suggestive that imagery is in this context, right?

"sexual" contact though... it seems like there's already an allowance being made for "in the course of duty" at least compared to muff diving a corpse...

In the corpse of duty?

rapeus corpus?