Just a little something.

Discussion in 'The Workshop' started by skinofevil, Jul 13, 2012.

  1. skinofevil

    skinofevil Fresh Meat

    Joined:
    Oct 23, 2009
    Messages:
    12,880
    Location:
    91367
    Ratings:
    +3,681
    That's generally how I revise; yes, all revisions are similar to that one.
  2. Lanzman

    Lanzman Vast, Cool and Unsympathetic Formerly Important

    Joined:
    Mar 27, 2004
    Messages:
    31,549
    Location:
    Someplace high and cold
    Ratings:
    +30,836
    Yep, second version is much tighter and more satisfying than the overbloated first cut.