Zardoz!

Discussion in 'The Red Room' started by Captain X, Nov 3, 2012.

  1. Captain X

    Captain X Responsible cookie control

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2009
    Messages:
    15,317
    Location:
    The Land of Snow and Cold
    Ratings:
    +9,695
    Zardoz!
    Last edited: Mar 20, 2015
  2. skinofevil

    skinofevil Fresh Meat

    Joined:
    Oct 23, 2009
    Messages:
    12,880
    Location:
    91367
    Ratings:
    +3,681
    So, out of curiosity, I looked up that movie. Sean Connery in a red diaper. Flying disembodied head. The entire membership of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee. No WTF is sufficient to capture the WTF factor of that film. Maybe the only thing that explains it is that it was made in the mid-1970s, when LSD was no longer considered strong enough but bath salts hadn't yet been repurposed for recreational psychosis.

    Yes... I think an entire production crew in the 1970s might very well have experimented with injecting oven cleaner directly into their scrotums, and Zardoz would certainly be a plausible product of such an experiment.
  3. Robotech Master

    Robotech Master '

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2004
    Messages:
    9,995
    Ratings:
    +3,935
    Highlander 2 is still his worst movie.
    • Agree Agree x 5
  4. Diacanu

    Diacanu Comicmike. Writer

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2004
    Messages:
    88,276
    Ratings:
    +59,701
    "First Knight", is a very close second....
  5. Tuckerfan

    Tuckerfan BMF Staff Member Moderator

    Joined:
    Oct 13, 2007
    Messages:
    42,002
    Location:
    Can't tell you, 'cause I'm undercover!
    Ratings:
    +74,428
  6. Paladin

    Paladin Overjoyed Man of Liberty

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2004
    Messages:
    48,060
    Location:
    Spacetime
    Ratings:
    +50,968
    DC Comics had a superhero--Vartox, a "hyper"-powered friend of Superman's--who was modeled after Sean Connery's appearance in Zardoz (even the names are similar):

    Zardoz:

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    Vartox:

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]
    • Agree Agree x 2
  7. Tamar Garish

    Tamar Garish Wanna Snuggle? Deceased Member

    Joined:
    Mar 27, 2004
    Messages:
    35,389
    Location:
    TARDIS
    Ratings:
    +22,754
    I've seen Zardoz. :shock:

    I wish I could unsee Zardoz. :cry:
    • Agree Agree x 4
  8. Amaris

    Amaris Guest

    Ratings:
    +0
    I remember watching it for the bewbies.
    It was a horrible, horrible mistake, but I was young! I didn't know! :cry:
    • Agree Agree x 2
  9. skinofevil

    skinofevil Fresh Meat

    Joined:
    Oct 23, 2009
    Messages:
    12,880
    Location:
    91367
    Ratings:
    +3,681
    "When aspirin alone dozn't, Zardoz."
    • Agree Agree x 2
  10. skinofevil

    skinofevil Fresh Meat

    Joined:
    Oct 23, 2009
    Messages:
    12,880
    Location:
    91367
    Ratings:
    +3,681
    The original Highlander should be remastered in HD and released as Highlander: The Apology.
  11. Bickendan

    Bickendan Custom Title Administrator Faceless Mook Writer

    Joined:
    May 7, 2010
    Messages:
    19,836
    Ratings:
    +20,294
    I've seen Zardoz. The use of Beethoven's 7th was the redeeming feature.


    Poor old Ludwig Van spun in his grave from the attempted Ultraviolence :(
  12. Robotech Master

    Robotech Master '

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2004
    Messages:
    9,995
    Ratings:
    +3,935
    Apparently they are remaking Highlander with Ryan Reynolds in the lead role.

    :ua:
  13. skinofevil

    skinofevil Fresh Meat

    Joined:
    Oct 23, 2009
    Messages:
    12,880
    Location:
    91367
    Ratings:
    +3,681
    They just can't stop hacking at its bones with their dull, chipped machetes, can they? :(
  14. Diacanu

    Diacanu Comicmike. Writer

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2004
    Messages:
    88,276
    Ratings:
    +59,701
    Next to the things I've seen?
    Zardoz is is a field trip to candy factory.
    :diacanu:
    • Agree Agree x 1
  15. Captain X

    Captain X Responsible cookie control

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2009
    Messages:
    15,317
    Location:
    The Land of Snow and Cold
    Ratings:
    +9,695
    It's a bad movie, but in a way that provides all kinds of entertainment. :D
    • Agree Agree x 1
  16. Tamar Garish

    Tamar Garish Wanna Snuggle? Deceased Member

    Joined:
    Mar 27, 2004
    Messages:
    35,389
    Location:
    TARDIS
    Ratings:
    +22,754
    Your mind is a collection of nightmares no normal person should go anywhere near.

    Zardoz is just bad.

    Your taste seems to run bad, fucked up, extremely nasty and bizarre. The more bizarre the better.
  17. Liet

    Liet Dr. of Horribleness, Ph.D.

    Joined:
    Jan 11, 2008
    Messages:
    15,570
    Location:
    Evil League of Evil Boardroom
    Ratings:
    +11,709
    I really didn't want to know that Diacanu is your stalker. :vomit:
  18. skinofevil

    skinofevil Fresh Meat

    Joined:
    Oct 23, 2009
    Messages:
    12,880
    Location:
    91367
    Ratings:
    +3,681
    You fust be shucking mitting me. Bat's the gest you've thought?
  19. Diacanu

    Diacanu Comicmike. Writer

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2004
    Messages:
    88,276
    Ratings:
    +59,701
    So...no copies of Harry Hembock for you n' Zel then?
    :unsure:
  20. Bulldog

    Bulldog Only Pawn in Game of Life

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2004
    Messages:
    31,225
    Location:
    State of Delmarva
    Ratings:
    +6,361
    I vomited blood through my ears for a week after watching it.
    • Agree Agree x 1
  21. Paladin

    Paladin Overjoyed Man of Liberty

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2004
    Messages:
    48,060
    Location:
    Spacetime
    Ratings:
    +50,968
    FTFY.
    • Agree Agree x 1
  22. actormike

    actormike Okay, Connery...

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2004
    Messages:
    25,392
    Location:
    LA
    Ratings:
    +13,609
    I've never seen Zardoz, but I can't imagine it's worse than Casino Royale (1967) or Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band.
  23. skinofevil

    skinofevil Fresh Meat

    Joined:
    Oct 23, 2009
    Messages:
    12,880
    Location:
    91367
    Ratings:
    +3,681
    Take the worst qualities of those two movies, add the worst qualities of The Great Rock'n'Roll Swindle, roll them all into one film, then watch that film dosed on bad LSD. And then you're almost there.
  24. Captain X

    Captain X Responsible cookie control

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2009
    Messages:
    15,317
    Location:
    The Land of Snow and Cold
    Ratings:
    +9,695
    No, Monster A-Go-Go is still the worst movie I've ever seen. At least Highlander 2 gives you something to work with when it comes to riffing. ;)
  25. Diacanu

    Diacanu Comicmike. Writer

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2004
    Messages:
    88,276
    Ratings:
    +59,701
    Eh, I kinda liked it.
    :shrug:

    But...I liked bits and pieces of those two other flicks so...
    :shrug:

    Highlander 2, however, has nothing to recommend it...
  26. Sokar

    Sokar Yippiekiyay, motherfucker. Deceased Member

    Joined:
    Oct 10, 2004
    Messages:
    14,494
    Location:
    Third stone from the sun
    Ratings:
    +8,347
    Sounds like perfect material for Mike and the bots, uh, Rifftrax. But if there are titties to be found, they'll probably not pursue it.
  27. Diacanu

    Diacanu Comicmike. Writer

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2004
    Messages:
    88,276
    Ratings:
    +59,701

    I shit you not, Vartox is going to be in the "Supergirl", series.
    He'll be played by Owen Yeoman.
    • Agree Agree x 2
  28. Paladin

    Paladin Overjoyed Man of Liberty

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2004
    Messages:
    48,060
    Location:
    Spacetime
    Ratings:
    +50,968
    Interesting. I guess I'm way out of touch because the promotional material describes Vartox as a villain.
  29. Diacanu

    Diacanu Comicmike. Writer

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2004
    Messages:
    88,276
    Ratings:
    +59,701
    I thought he was bad at first, and came around.
  30. Paladin

    Paladin Overjoyed Man of Liberty

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2004
    Messages:
    48,060
    Location:
    Spacetime
    Ratings:
    +50,968
    I remember he and Superman fought early on, but I thought Vartox was merely misunderstood.

    Interestingly, Vartox is actually more powerful than Superman. He's got pretty much the same powers as Superman ("hyperpowers"), but also has a number of abilities Superman lacks. I like his ability to throw "remote control" punches, which lets him punch someone from a distance.

    [​IMG]
    • Agree Agree x 1