So um there's this. It's official

Yeah, it was s'posed to come through as 'piece of barking monkey shit', but either Google translate sucks or Russian does.

not having read it, I have no real way to speak to quality but I will say that it's the SORT of material that lends itself to that sort of thing.

The only caution I have in terms of "franchise" thinking is that it reminds me somewhat of things like "Sky Captain" and Buckaroo Banzi and while that might lead to several books, in the past such material got one stand-alone film project instead of a series of installments.

Maybe too "niche"?

Also, along with Mike, there's still the ongoing potential that Jazz sells something significant. Graphic art stories are still fiction writing.

"piece of shit, barking monkey" actually makes a little more sense.

"shit barfing monkey" would have been better overall.

either way, your urge to suck Storm's dick-as demonstrated by your jumping in front of a bullet point of critique-is duly noted. You're kinda like that Eminem song, aren't ya? Your mancrush manifesting in pale imitation ending in you driving off a bridge with a pregnant hooker in the trunk.

The driving-off-the-bridge-with-a-pregnant-hooker-in-the-trunk escapade was last week. This week I'm going for dousing my balls with lighter fluid, lighting them, and then dancing naked on top of a squad car wearing a Mohammed drawing as a mask while cheered on by Tea Partiers to the accompaniment of Run DMC's cover/collaboration version of "Walk This Way", then reaping the profits and fame thanks to YouTube.

And if you see dick sucking in my standing up for a friend, you either don't have any friends or just have dick sucking on your mind as a matter of course. Either is a little sad, and I'd feel bad for you over it except that I'm a sociopath with no feelings. Oh, well. Whaddyagonnado?

Great news!

I was running out of kindling for my fireplace after I burned all my Mike Meggison and Margaret Wander Bonnano books.

(But seriously... a very big congrats, sir, and I look forward to reading it.)

Systransoft's translator has a hard time figuring out whether the "barking" modifies the monkey or the shit. But if you enter "You piece of shit of a monkey which barks," you get the following (I substituted the familiar you for the formal you):

ты часть дерьма обезьяны которая лаяет.

This is closer to right (and is grammatically correct), but is not quite smooth. I know there's a way to avoid the awkward "которая лаяет" ("which barks"), but my Russian isn't good enough yet for me to say "barking" as an adjective in the genitive case.

I see the dick sucking man lust from your rather preemptive shit fit before the man even had opportunity to speak for himself - and agree with the point I raised. You're not standing up, you're rushing to shield your idol from criticism...telling everyone to just leave [-]Britney[/-] Stormy alone.


It was only a fact there, Stan... that's not so bad, not so bad at all, is it?

Visionrazor's been a Storm fan ever since the tag-teaming troll-equivalent thigh-crushing squeezetoy got back in the day.

Practically obsessed with kissing his ass and trying to be like him. It's so adorable!

Besides, there were two ways to interpret it -- either I was shielding Storm, or I was just having a larf at you. Which I've never done that before, have I?

All the best on this and congratulations on hard work, perseverance, and following your dream paying off--in at least you're getting your shot--maybe more.

That said, I always figured you as more of a short story guy.

Congrats Storm.

If it bombs hard, I'll travel to Texas myself so you can earn some money from giving me a hand job. But you'll have to gimme something to work with, so I hope you at least will make enough to buy yourself a wig.

Honest question.

How long is it? I have the attention span of a....

You expect him to give you a penis?

How much heroin?

Outstanding, Storm.

Man, I gotta get off my ass and finish a novel so I can start trying to publish . . .

Well,come what may, best of luck Storm.

Excellent news Storm, I'll definately be picking up a copy for you to autograph....

That is unless you want to just send me one.

Here's the deal I'll make you for what it's worth, and it may be worthless...

If you can show me you bought and downloaded a digital edition, I'll mail you a personalized trade paperback edition, signed and saying "You have the biggest dick I ever saw," or, alternately, "Your vagina doesn't smell as bad as it tastes."

Deal?

Just wanted some degree of separation from our little online ghetto.

Congrats!

Best guess: in the neighborhood of 90,000-110,000 words. For the first book, that is; expect the word count to go up with subsequent installments depending on the "box office" for the first one.

on your ass?

I thought you'd been working on the asteroid attractor ray?

Kindle? Nook?
Yes?

Cool! Just in time for Christmas. Looking forward to it!

Listen, I'm gonna buy it. But don't be mailing me shit. I don't want you to know who I am, where I live, or how awesome I really am.

Nobody will ever accuse you of being awesome, I promise you.

So, anyone knows how to pirate a signed copy?

Congrats, Storm. Not really my cup of diesel but I will give it a try.

I have many projects.