Horror film, never-done-before storyline (and I do mean NEVER done before storyline) small local production company, low-budget -- but it's a mainstream genre, not fetish erotica, so at least it's a credit I can use to get bigger (and more lucrative) projects coming my way. I'd stick around to see if anybody gives a shit, but I'm too busy.
Hmm. Okay. Let's see what 5 page chunks look like. FADE IN: A chase from the view of the hunter, low to the ground, jolting slightly in time to the sound of galloping animal footfalls, moving fast. There’s a flash of moonlit tan fabric ahead of us before it disappears through a tangle of foliage. Blast through that foliage and there it is again in an open field; a man in a khaki vest, running from us, huffing and out of breath. He’s about to collapse from exhaustion. Finally, he does. We’re on him in less than a second, staring down at his throat as he turns over. We’re ready to strike, but... someone else is here. We look up at him. He’s tall, in a long, dark coat and wide-brimmed hat. Blue light bursts from his eyes. The world fills with the sound of a felled wolf. CUT TO BLACK OPENING CREDITS EXT. FOREST - NIGHT We float, ghostly, through the moonlit trees as we listen to BEN (v.o.) I believed once. I believed all of it. Every parable. Noah’s Ark. The flood. The parting of the Red Sea. Walking on water, the feeding of the multitudes, and the resurrection. All of it. Everything mom and dad read to me from the Bible. I was five. The moonlight takes on a surreal, artificial quality. BEN (CONT'D) (v.o., cont’d) My grandparents, other family, even the people the state put me with... they were true believers, too. They weren’t there, didn’t see what I saw. I stopped believing the night my parents died. There are demons, though. Those are real. SPOOKY MUSIC fades up through a SERIES OF SHOTS all rapid-fire and chaotic: -A GIRL, blonde, wearing a virtually see-through negligee, approaches us at a run, absolutely terrified of something we haven’t yet seen. -A TWO-HANDED FELLING AXE in a black-gloved hand, swinging lazily at the side of a walking FIGURE seen only from the elbow down. There is a large, bloodied butcher knife protruding from the FIGURE’S abdomen. -Following on THE GIRL’S heels, we crash through tree limbs fat with autumn leaves. -THE FIGURE continuing through the trees at the same unhurried pace, the axe still swinging, silvery moonlight gleaming along the blade, flashing across the edge. -Following THE GIRL as she looks over her shoulder, then abruptly falls out of view. -THE GIRL falling into view at ground level, crying out against intense pain, Her ankle is twisted at an unnatural angle. She tries to get back to her feet, fails - just too painful. She looks over her shoulder, at us. -From THE GIRL’S P.O.V., we finally see THE FIGURE - it’s a tall, formidably built man lumbering toward us, machete in hand, the butcher knife still buried in his gut, his face covered by a soiled and cracked hockey mask. Behind the mask, the skull is scarred, deformed. The image begins to take on too much contrast, the colors brighten as we slowly PULL BACK TO REVEAL the edges of the television on which the preceding shots were played out. We continue to pull back until we are in BEN (CONT'D) INT. DRAPER HOUSE - LIVING ROOM - NIGHT Domino’s box and Budweiser bottles on the coffee table, THREE KIDS in front of the television: SETH TANNER, 16 years old, and JAKE BIANCO, 20, sit on the couch; on the loveseat to their right reclines a gorgeous brunette, KYLA GRAZIANO, 18 years old. The three have been working their way through the beer, and the two boys are well beyond buzzed and into drunk. SETH This has got to be the best Friday the 13th ever. JAKE You’re stoned. Number 4 was the best one. They shouldn’t even have made any after number 4, they totally killed him in that one. KYLA (shakes her head) You can’t kill Jason, though. JAKE Killed him fuckin’ dead. Even the guys that made the movie said that was it, he was fuckin’ dead. SETH (blows air through his teeth) Yeah, and then a year later they said, “Holy shit, we’re broke!” All three kids laugh. A fourth kid enters - BEN GORDON, 17, a tall, dark-haired kid with an intense look to him. He’s on his cellular phone, looking around at the others as he speaks into it. BEN Yeah, everything’s great. (beat) Well, actually everything’s really boring, but that’s still your definition of ‘great’, isn’t it? BEN holds his hand over the mouthpiece. BEN (CONT'D) (to other kids) Turn that shit off. (back into phone) Yeah. Yes, 10 o’clock. Yes, I’m ready for the math test. Okay. Night. Ben puts his phone away. The television’s still on, still playing the slasher flick. He walks over, changes the channel, faces the other kids. BEN (CONT'D) I’m going to assume you didn’t hear me. SETH and JAKE make innocent faces. KYLA reaches for BEN, pulls him down to her and plants a passionate kiss on him. SETH and JAKE give each other looks. BEN (CONT'D) Fine, you’re forgiven. JAKE What’s your deal with slasher flicks, man? I know you’re not turning into a Jesus-freak on us. BEN grabs an unopened beer from the table, twists it open, then waits for KYLA to swing her legs up before sitting next to her as she rests her long legs on his lap. He takes a deep pull. KYLA looks annoyed, but not by BEN. BEN I don’t need to find religion, I remember where I left it. (more seriously) I used to like ‘em when I was a kid. Just lost my taste for it, that’s all. It’s just annoying after a while, you know? I mean, you ever notice you’ve got Evil and you’ve got victims, but Good never shows up? SETH So Good as in God, right? JAKE Good would get its ass beat. Seriously. KYLA Watch it, buddy. BEN (to KYLA) I don’t think we’re gonna see any wrath any time soon, babe. God’s about as real as - KYLA sits up, angry. KYLA Don’t. I hate it when you talk about God like that. BEN You ever wonder why He hasn’t stopped me yet? He can’t, He doesn’t exist, there’s no such thing. KYLA stands, fuming, and walks away. A moment later, we hear the front door SLAM and the sound of a car leaving in a hurry. SETH Way to go, man. BEN (angrily) Yeah, thanks for bringing it up. Dick. SETH jumps up, it looks like it may come to blows. Before it can, though, there’s a KNOCK at the door. SETH and BEN ignore it, staring daggers at each other. JAKE Hey, tough guy - hey, Ben! SETH looks away, backing down. BEN finally looks at JAKE. JAKE (CONT'D) Go answer your door, man. BEN walks away to answer the door, his posture still one of anger. JAKE is now glaring at SETH. CUT TO: EXT. DRAPER HOUSE - FRONT DOOR - NIGHT OVER THE SHOULDER of VISITOR AT THE FRONT DOOR as BEN opens it, the look on his face changing to surprise. Over BEN’S shoulder, we see that the visitor is a casually dressed, good-looking blond-haired kid about BEN’S age. He extends a hand. RAPHAEL HI! My name’s Raphael - BEN (curt) Look, no offense, but it’s late. If you’re selling something - RAPHAEL shakes his head, smiling.
RAPHAEL No, man, I’m not selling anything. Just new around here. I was walking by and saw your family was still up, so I wanted to say hi and introduce myself. BEN is surprised and a little unsure. Something about the way RAPHAEL talks, or maybe just the way he’s standing here, is just a little wrong. In fact, the guy has a very weird vibe of artificiality to him, like he just figured out how to stand and how to talk five minutes ago. He looks sincere and friendly, just not entirely *real.* BEN Okay, well... nice to meet you. Maybe I’ll see you around. Inside the house, SETH and JAKE are TALKING LOUDLY, ALARMED. We can’t make out what they’re saying, only the tone of their voices. RAPHAEL starts to smile broadly. RAPHAEL (nods) Believe. RAPHAEL, still smiling, turns and walks away. BEN closes the door, looking a little disturbed by the exchange. CUT TO: INT. DRAPER HOUSE - LIVING ROOM - NIGHT JAKE and SETH are have stopped talking and are just on their feet, bewildered, as BEN comes back into the room. BEN What’s wrong with you guys? Then he picks up on the difference in their postures -- they’re not slouching, not loose and comfortable as they were a few moments ago. SETH My buzz is gone. BEN (incredulous) What?! JAKE Mine, too. (holds up his beer) Like I hadn’t even opened one of these yet. I’m 8 o’clock Monday morning sober. SETH We both are. Oh, this is fucking weird... BEN yawns, then checks his watch. BEN Well, you can talk about the Case of the Missing Buzz if you want, I’m going to bed. SETH and JAKE look at each other, then get up. JAKE We gotta head out, anyway. (beat) Seriously, though, the kid’s right - this is the weirdest shit ever. They head for the door. SETH Don’t call me a kid, I fuckin’ hate that. JAKE (laughing) Whatever, kid. SETH slugs JAKE in the arm, and all three EXIT. CUT TO: EXT. DRAPER HOUSE - FRONT DOOR - NIGHT SETH and JAKE walking out, BEN watching them leave. Then BEN remembers their strange visitor, and his expression changes from a smirk to a worried frown. He closes the door, and we FADE TO BLACK. RADIO D.J. (O.S.) This is Jimmy Dean with the Morning Rush on 98 KNOK, the School of Hard Knocks and Hard Rock, kickin’ off another hour of today’s best. We’ve got... (fades into background) FADE UP: EXT. PARADISO HIGH SCHOOL - PARKING LOT - DAY In the BACKROUND looms the large high school and crowds of milling STUDENTS. In the FOREGROUND, more STUDENTS socialize in small circles surrounding their assorted vehicles. ANGLE ON a cherry red MINI COOPER CONVERTIBLE and its occupants, BEN and KYLA. BEN’S P.O.V. KYLA is obviously still unhappy with him, staring straight ahead as she parks the car and gets out. He follows, looking at her, then shaking his head. BEN So are you gonna ignore me every morning you give me a ride until the end of the year? KYLA purses her lips, looks at a passing cloud like she’s reading words from it, then finally looks at him. KYLA That’s an option. They grab their backpacks full of school stuff out of the back seat. BEN Another one is you could just accept that I can’t believe in what you believe in. You have other friends that don’t. They start walking toward the school, and KYLA’s posture is no longer so aloof, more teasing now, the tone of her voice more playful. KYLA Another option is you can ride the bus. And - (stops him, plants a less-than-pure kiss) - I don’t do that with my other friends. BEN (grins) I’ve got a camera. KYLA (laughs) Don’t push it! SETH (O.S.) Hey! Ben, hey! SETH runs toward them, apprehension and excitement on his face. He reaches them out of breath. KYLA Seth, what’s wrong? BEN Catch your breath, man. BEN and KYLA move to continue toward the school, but SETH grabs them. SETH There’s no school today. They’re sending everybody home. Principal McGregor was murdered last night. BEN and KYLA stop stock-still. BEN (shocked) Are you serious? KYLA (puts a hand over her mouth) Oh, my God... SETH turns back toward the school. SETH’S P.O.V. CLOSE on the High School’s main entrance, where TEACHERS are turning back STUDENTS whose faces show everything from shock to tears to insensitive glee. CROWDS of students collide and mingle as the departing relay the news to the incoming. BEN Jesus! How did it happen? KYLA shoots him an outraged look, but now isn’t the time to get on his case. She looks to SETH for the answer to BEN’S question. SETH (leans forward, talking low and fast) His neighbors found him gutted and chopped up. On his front lawn, on his fucking front lawn! A NEWS VAN glides past them toward the school. KYLA (sickened) Oh, God... She looks sick, tears welling up. She throws her backpack back in her car and jumps in. BEN Kyla! She starts the car, not listening, and pulls out fast. BEN (CONT'D) (more urgent) Hey, Kyla! Too late - she’s out of there. BEN and SETH watch her car disappear around the corner and onto the main street. SETH (not understanding) So... BEN (shoulders his backpack) Principal McGregor is a friend of her parents, mine too. Was. They all go to the same church. They did. SETH (getting it) Oh. BEN starts walking. SETH (CONT'D) Where are you going?
Obviously, this is pretty early stuff. I think I went a little crazy with capitalization, but that's all in good fun.
So now I'm getting word from my buddy Todd that Universal has also shown some interest in this story. I'm not putting any weight behind that until I see paperwork or suits to back it up, but the idea is a fun one to rattle around.
It's complete! First draft plus first pass editing to clean up some minor CAPITALIZATION overuse in the first act, a little dialogue and description revision. 100 pages, but with a lot of action, which would have made 120 pages too long a script. Title is a toss-up right now between Dread God and Testament. Think a three-way cross between Evil Dead, The Prophecy and The Matrix.
I just checked the datestamps. I still can't believe I wrote a feature-length screenplay in exactly 1 month.
Is that one month of 8 hour days? If you write one a month and only sell 10 percent, you'll still make a decent living. Hope you're successful...you're at least as good as 90 percent of the "cookie cutter" movies being released.
BTW, who wrote for "That Seventies Show?" Hands-down most flat, unfunny writing of any sitcom, period. Only fantasies of a Mila/Laura tryst kept that show afloat IMO.
