I know I'm going to get in bad trouble for this thread, because this stuff is supposed to be top secret, but somehow the Enemies of the People (meaning: conservatives) have found out a lot of it anyway, so we might as well just admit it openly. In any case, it's too late to do anything about it. Biden has won, the election has been certified, and one week from today the new regime will take over and put an end to America as we know it. So let's reveal openly just what Biden's plans are, at least for his first year in office. This is why we voted for him, after all: 1) Taxes: Taxes on businesses and rich people (anyone making more than $100,000 dollars a year) are going to be raised to 120% of disposable income. IOW, even when the government has taken away all their money, they will still owe money to the government. 2) Welfare: The lazy, shiftless, dishonest, incompetent or just plain useless will be guaranteed free housing, cars and wide-screen TVs, in addition to about $5000 a month being given to them for every member of the family. This will avoid them having to get jobs where their drug use might result in injuries to themselves. 3) Immigration: There will be no more limits on immigration, but there will be preferences. All potential immigrants will be given a card to fill out, asking them to check the boxes of things they do regulary: murder, rape, terrorist attacks, armed robbery, drug dealing, and mafia-style organized crime. Those who can check at least one box will be "fast tracked" for immigration. Those who can check at least three boxes will immediately have green cards mailed to them and to all their family members, no further questions asked. 4) Government forms: No government paperwork will be made available in English any more, since it is being phased out. All forms will be available in Chinese, Spanish and Arabic, however. 5) Gay marriage: All those currently married to someone of the opposite sex will be required to get divorced immediately and marry someone of the same sex. 6) Abortions: Random lotteries will determine which pregnancies of white women must be terminated immediately, in order to make room for the immigrants. 7) Republicans: The GOP will be outlawed, it's leaders put into re-education camps, and all those who ever voted Republican will be put on lists for close government scrutiny. 8) Elections: The election system will be streamlined to make it much easier for everyone. Instead of having everyone go out to the polls, the officially-decided results will simply be announced by the state-controlled media. This will avoid unnecessary hassle with suitcases and re-programmed voting machines. 9) Christmas: Christmas will be forbidden, as will any mention of it. To avoid offending the immigrants, however, everyone will be required to observe Ramadan. 10) Conservatives: All conservatives will of course be in chains, so we can ride them like ponies. Those are the main points I'm aware of, and that come to me off the top of my head. If you are aware of any others, or if I have forgotten anything important, feel free to add it in.
I forgot the gulags! Gulags for the socially, mentally and psychologically unfit, of course. I'm just hoping Biden will give me the cabinet position he promised me, in return for all those suitcases of ballots I sent over, where I get to designate those who are unfit...
First year? More like First Hundred Days! By year's end, the US will get just another province of the PRC! And then, comrades, it's Cultural Revolution II: American Boogaloo!
I think we all know people who claim number 2 is true already. So is Biden just rehashing the Trump agenda? Why does everything have to be so derivative?
I submitted the following proposal to the Biden agenda, otherwise known as the First One Year Plan: All veterans of the United States military shall be immediately debriefed by Biden-approved commissars, who will then assume political control of all military units (and who will all be Han Chinese, of course). Deviance from the commissars' directives will be punishable by exile to the frozen hinterlands of Alaska. Upon discharge from the military, all pre-Biden era veterans will be required to wear Cones of Shame (made in China) which will reveal them as the capitalist lapdogs they are. Special tomatoes (the redder the better) will be administered to the public for throwing at these enemies of the People. Please do not eat the tomatoes--save that appetite for the bread lines, comrade!
Don't forget the death panels!! Oh, wait, Trumpers did that by asking old people to march into the covid. Stop stealing our ideas! That was ours!
They told me if I voted for Hillary we'd end up with bread lines and rationing health care ... technically they were right!
I am dishonoured. I am ashamed. Yes indeed, free healthcare for everyone, paid for by the rich because no one deserves to have even as much as a million dollars. It's the new communist way!
What kind of drugs do I have to do to get the welfare? Do I just have to inject a marijuana every once in a while, or do I have to do the hard stuff like goofballs?
Remember when right wingers were scared that Obama would institute Sharia Law and force people to convert to Islam? Pepperidge Farm remembers.
