I've just been discussing this with some friends of mine. What IS masculinity? Is it dependant on heterosexuality? Why is it that it's considered very "male" to shag around when single, but commit PROPERLY, as in, believe you have a long future, when you commit? Does masculinity even exist anymore? I was writing an essay the other day about this, and one thing I noticed, was that the gay mags were VERY much about one night stands. In the whole magazine, relationships were mentioned TWICE. Once was due to the interviewee bringing up the subject of his boyfriend, and the other was due to the reply to a problem page. In the problem page, the writer asked about getting a boyfriend. He had been out since 16, was 25 now, and was worried about the fact he didn't have one, was getting jealous of his hetero friends who were all getting married, and was worried that there was something wrong with him. Out of four replies - 1 'expert', 3 readers - 1 talked about his first bf, who he apparently got at 30, the others said 'don't worry, have fun being single' and 1 even said ' why are you jealous of your friends? Marriage is for straight fugly people'. The male mags were terrified of seeming even a bit 'gay', where female mags have fashion, they didn't, men aren't taught to appreciate and judge the male form like women are taught with the female. The female mags had an article on telling the bf about how many men you had slept with, and concluded that you should lie, for an easy life. The gay mags seemed to promote seemed like a hyper masculinity, the stereotype of the predatory male taken to an extreme, because there was no female to try and sate with a relationship at the end. Is the idea of masculinity and feminity outdated now? Should there be more specific terms (dominate, submissive, compromising, certain, etc), or is there something you could still call 'masculine' that everyone could agree on?
But what seperates masculinity from femininity? Do you have to be male to be masculine? Or at least, does it make you less to be? And does it even matter anymore? Is masculinity better than femininity? If so, why? Or are these terms outdated?
No, but some of the traditional ideas about what defines them might be. Then again, plenty of people still adhere to those traditional ideas. I would say that instead of going away, the old rigid definitions are becoming one way among many available for people to organize their realities. They are no longer predominant, but still present.
