Something like this is going on UA's gravestone

Gender-swapped, obviously, which no doubt would trigger yet another rant.

I was expecting

Given his humiliation kink I was thinking eternal golden showers of the dimwit mind would have been what he already signed up for.

I don't think burying UA in the ground would be very practical. He's still going to insist on getting up and riding his bike to work every day because no one has the authority to tell him he has to lie still in a casket covered by several feet of dirt just because he's dead. He'll need a slot in a mausoleum modified with a door he can open and close.

Rest of corpses/ghosts- Hey, whoa, slow down, Mister Athlete! You're making the rest of us look bad!

UA- The afterlife is a union!! Noooo!!!!

There's an old "Tales From the Dark Side" episode called "A Case of the Stubborns" that shows how to deal with that. Here's a clip showing you how far things have got before they found a solution.



And holy shit! That's fucking Christian Slater! I saw this episode when it first aired, I saw "Heathers" when it came out on video, and I don't know how many other films with Slater in them and never once did I connect the two.

That’s actually probably accurate.

There needs to be a warning on some of your posts not to be drinking while reading them. The bubbles hurt my brain.