So walking to my car from work today, I found a wallet just sitting on the sidewalk near the stadium. No one around. So I grabbed it, for...safekeeping.... Went thru the wallet once I was safe in the car. It belongs to a 29-year-old black man who: is or has recently been unemployed (Missouri Access Debit card which is how the state pays Unemployment $$), has been to prison and is out on parole (Parole officer's card plus several related pices of paper) is training to be a cook/chef (Cooking school papers) is possibly homeless (card of local homeless shelter) is pawning off a PS3 (pawn shop slip) has a big dick (Magnum condom)! No cash in the wallet, but the DL, SSN card, a couple of debit cards are still there. So I know if I lost my wallet, I'd want it back. So I'm planning on returning it if I can track down the guy. Problem is, he's could be dangerous. He's been in jail, and is possibly homeless. What if he thinks I stole his wallet? (I know, it doesn't make logical sense, 'cause why would I even bother to try to track him down if that was the case? But I don't know if he's a logical thinker...) So what should Nautica do? Oh, and just to keep this in the Red Room...FUCK ALL THE HOMELESS JAILBIRD WALLET-LOSING MUTHAFUCKA'S!!!!!!!!! UP THEIR ASS WITH A LEAD PIPE!!!!
I vote parole officer. While your fears of him being violent towards you are well founded given the evaluation of the contents, I'd be more concerned about him wanting to be your new pal. On a side note, good for him for taking up a trade in cooking. The world always needs another good cook imho.
I would say if you are concerned about potential conflict, I would give it to his parole officer. Call the parole officer and arrange a time/place where you can hand it to the parole officer. This way you AND the guy's wallet will be safe. Mailing a wallet is risky. What if that gets lost in the mail or tampered with? Best to not take the chances and hand it over in person. You have to give the guy some props for carrying a condom!! STD's are not cool, nor is unwanted pregnancy!! That is good to hear he's concerned about safety first!!!
Take the card debit cards and get 10 cartons of smokes, 10 cases of beer and fill your motorhome with gasoline then fling the cards all in the trash.
Just give it to him in person. Homeless, ex-con, or not he'll still be happy to have a his wallet back.
If you don't want to meet him in person do what other people have said and give it to his parole officer.
I vote "parole officer," since you seem concerned about meeting him in person and the poll is clearly what people suggest you do. If it was me, I would meet him in person without hesitation, but I am not you.
Parole Officer. The Officer will probably have a better shot at finding him and on the off chance the guy skipped on his parole terms you telling the officer where you found the wallet could help get the guy off the street if need be.
I'm sorry if you took this, too, wrong. There was absolutely no "holier than thou" intended. Recognizing that different people have different priorities and different ways of doing things in no way implies an order of value between those different ways. For all I know, you may well be wiser in being concerned about meeting him than I am in not even worrying about it. It's just that that's the way I work.
Obviously you steal his identity, so you can go on a crime spree and have him take the blame. Just call me 'Slippery' Jim DiGriz...
Update - Well, the Parole Officer wasn't returning my calls, so I tried the Homeless Shelter worker who said she'd handle it. So I left the wallet w/ the front desk security person in my office building. She didn't want to take it, and I had to lie and say I found it on the building grounds. Luckily, one of the janitors was there to help talk her into it. I think the fact that there is no cash in the wallet helped, actually. But the front-desh security gal didn't like the situation...I could tell that much. Still, it's out of my hands now. The janitor actually shook my hand and thanked me for my honesty.
Show enough of a spine to at least attempt tracking him down in person. Then try the parole officer, then leave it with the cops.
I'm not satisfied with the explanation that we have right now. The person at the homeless shelter said that she would handle it. Does that mean that she will send an employee of the shelter around to pick up the wallet; or that she will notify the owner of the location of the wallet, and he will come around and pick it up? I don't think that leaving the wallet at your building is a good idea. I think that taking the wallet to the shelter would be preferable, even if it's out of your way.
She didn't specify. Why does it matter? She said she couldn't even tell me whether or not she knew the person, due to some confidentiality clause. If she's that much of a protocol stickler, I'm willing to bet she's an honest person. Hell, I give her extra credit for simply working at a homeless shelter--people like that do it to HELP others, not to scam them! And just why not? You've given no decent argument against it.... You just don't seem to LIKE it. Wah. Too bad. Given that: a) I'm not sure where the shelter even is (although I could probably find it), and b) I have no clue whether the dude is even there, Why should I waste my friggin' time traipsing all over downtown? I did my part--the wallet is now far more accessible to the dude than when I had it.
You were concerned about meeting the owner of the wallet. The owner is probably interested in finding out who took his wallet. If the wallet was found at your building, he might want to check it out. He might even inquire, in a nice way, as to who found his wallet. This does not seem to be the ideal situation, based on the parameters that you established in the first post.
When you find Bill Gates' wallet, you arrange to deliver it to him. When you find a bums wallet, you toss it in a ditch or give it to someone who gives a fuck. Why all the consternation?
Erroneous assumption #1 - I did not TAKE his wallet, I *FOUND* his wallet. Erroneous assumption #2 - the wallet was not found at my building. It was found a few blocks away, but as I said above, I lied to the front desk security lady about that so she'd allow me to leave it w/ her. Erroneous assumption #3 - the front desk security lady doesn't know me. She has no clue who I am, other than a typical office grunt in a 30-fucking-story-office building with secure access to each individual floor. Wow, Cobalt, your post is almost as retarded as a Starguard thread. You are incredibly full of FAIL!
Slip a Chick tract into it and give it to his parole officer. May I suggest my personal favorite, the Dark Dungeons issue.
This bum would be really fucking happy if I lost my wallet and someone returned it to me intact, so I'd handle the reverse situation with that in mind.
