Question: Men of Wordforge

You and your friends were at a bar, where you picked up the hottest piece of ass you've EVER seen, and brought her home to do nasty, unspeakable things to her.

But as soon as you get home, your pal John Smith shows up, drunk and crying about his ex.

By Man Law, is it mandatory to toss your wimpy friend out the door and then fuck the girl?

FUCK yeah!

No man is should be coming to another one to whine about his ex in the first place. You bitch about them at an appropriate public venue, like a bar, game or a barbeque.

Have your way with her, then pass her on to him and let him take her home so you don't need to deal with her in the morning.

Or that.

Is this really a question???

I don't know that it's mandatory but it's pretty damn likely in almost every case.

Well, memes like Good Guy Greg exist for a reason. Surely there's a guy out there who would be stupid enough to pass it up!

"Hey hey, I feel for you, pal, but go play some Smash Bros. for a bit. I've got some business needing my urgent attention, and I'll hear you out when I'm done putting around the greens."

Bonus points if the hot piece of ass you find at the bar is your pal John Smith's ex!

Man Law dictates John Smith recognize the magnitude of his pal's situation and excuse himself immediately.

Yep. Man law dictates that a dude not show up crying about his ex in the first place, but if he does, he shouldn't expect to be a higher priority than a willing woman.

Let me be the sensitive male here and say I'm sorry you were tossed aside for another guy, TKO.

So how did your date go last night?

But what should the friend do? Does "bros before hos" apply, or did the first guy remove his right to invoke that clause by breaking the code himself?

The latter.

And, bros before hos is more a suggestion than a rule.

i would never ignore a friend in need just so i could get laid. you see, i'm a sensitive sort. i think that's why ladies like to fuck me.

I'd never know my drunk friend showed up at all because the door would be closed, locked, and I'd be in the back bedroom getting it on.

Plus, most of my friends aren't the type to cry about their ex- more like organize a drunken, karaoke singing, pub crawl to celebrate and find fresh game. In fact, that's probably where I found the hot chick in the first place...

No harm, no foul.

If you have to ask the question then the answer just isn't going to help ya.

Yeah, but how difficult is it for you to get laid if you want to? It's sort of an opportunity cost question. If you're somebody who can get laid anytime by walking into a bar and saying "Hey, who wants to go home with me?" the opportunity cost is lower than if you know another opportunity isn't going to come along for a while.

I tell John Smith to piss off and get back to the girl.

Hopefully, the chick will see you toss your crying friend out the door and gets so disgusted by your actions that she follows him out....then catches up with poor John Smith and is so moved by his plight, takes him home to comfort him.

Sorry, Bros before Hoes.

In this case, such a woman (casual bar pickup) would be considered a "Hoe". Wives and steady girlfriends do NOT count as "Hoes" for the purposes of the "Bros before Hoes" clause.

Admittedly, John Smith may very well be in violation of Man Law, but that doesn't excuse me for violating Man Law.

None of my friends would be wimpy enough to show up whining about an ex-girlfriend.

So, basically, it's a Kobayashi Maru scenario.

The answer is yes.

I'd give em a 20 and tell him to fuck off at the neighborhood pub for 20 minutes. That should give me enough time to do my thing and then give me an excuse to boot her ass out the door before she bores me with her incessant, talking.

A real man would never let his personal shit cockblock a friend.

Man Law says, "Let's get together and talk about it later, bro."

You and the girl can talk about it once you get married.