Nova in Hospital

Another issue with PayPal is getting access to the funds in a manner Nova could us them. Nova would need a bank account to transfer them to, or Nova would need to apply for a PayPal debit card, or third Nova would need a check sent out from PayPal.

A check or transfer can take from 3 days to up to two weeks, a debit card would make the funds available right away as soon as she was approved and then received the card.

You are a walking, talking piece of shit, you know that?

Nova has been able to access money sent by paypal before. Most recent from me was a couple years ago, but maybe someone else has sent money more recently?

Okay, so Tuckerfan got me worried so instead of waiting till I got home I PM'ed Nova on my phone. Or thought I did, it was actually a wall post, which is kinda embarrassing as I discussed money. Oh well.

Her wife wrote me back a little while later saying she had never used Paypal but other people had asked about it so she wanted to know what email I sent the money to and that she would get the password from Nova. Apparently transportation is an issue, as she mentioned she was 'trying' to get a ride to see her tomorrow. I made it clear that as soon as she confirmed she could get access to the funds to write me as there are others who would like to donate.

To be honest I'm not sure what the best course of action here is. @Lanzman has said he has her mailing address, maybe paypaling him money and he could pick up a money order? I'd hate to send gift or cash cards as she lives in a shithole and IIRC has mentioned people fucking with her mail. To be honest I'm also kinda worried about his wife being in charge of disbursing the funds, but I'm not really any better options.

Anyone else have any ideas?

I remember someone being in contact with the hospital, have we asked them to pass along word to Nova herself that we're working on financial support?

I called the hospital but they would only connect me to the ICU waiting room (got no answer).

Not to rain on parades, but I don't use Paypal. Had a bad experience with them and haven't trusted the service since.

Yeah, it would suck if his wife had to get a job.

Question... do Paypal funds get transferred directly to the recipient's bank account? If so, sending funds that way to someone whose finances are very rough might not be the best thing. If the account is overdrawn, the bank would just use the deposits to cover the overdraft and they wouldn't be available for immediate needs.

From what I've experienced, Paypal donations go to the account holder. They stay there unless the account holder withdraws the money (via debit card or check), or transfers it to a bank account.

This whole situation sucks. His wife is emotionally unstable, prone to violent rages, hates Tammy and is unhealthfully obsessed with Shepherd. She has multiple mental illnesses she needs meds for but has gone unmedicated for years and she could just as easily get her hands on the money and do something stupid with it as save it for Nova's situation. Nova has handled all the bills, all the running of the house..anything of import Nova manages it as well as she can. Plus the two kids...a 12 year old and one who must be almost 19 by now but refuses to get a job. To say it was a mess before the accident is an understatement. I actually am afraid what Nova is going to have to face next both medically and at home now her abuser will have all the power over her.

Do US hospitals have dedicated social offices / workers (most German ones do)? If so, and since Anc can apparently identify the patient on the phone, we might have someone there whose job requires them to diligently coordinate any help there is, and respect all of Nova's needs.

So are donations going via PayPal? If so I'll get some sent over, if not if someone could PM the details. I'm not on the board uber-frequently, but a PM notification should come through to one of my email addresses.

Hence why I have a separate account for PayPal as a Just In Case thing. Plus, if anyone hacks my PayPal they can't get to my main account so easily.

In other words, to get rid of any cultural translation problems: Whom would we speak to in order to help our friend Nova if she didn't have any family or nearby friends?

Okay. I've been lying awake this morning and coming up with a tentative plan of action for myself. I don't have names for Nova or the hospital so don't panic if this is the worst idea ever.

Our current/new church seems to be oriented toward service. We've got some conservative old people hanging around who probably disapprove of transsexuality, but a lot of the congregation is, like, lower-middle-aged or younger and the pastor is a man of God who probably doesn't care about the trans thing and wouldn't let it stop him in this case anyway.

Tomorrow I can go into church early and lay the thing before him, see what he thinks can be done. I have an acquaintance down in Mississippi who broke her neck working for dirt pay at WalMart, she's too poor to have health insurance, we expect WalMart to drag its feet and get defensive over what little work comp she'll receive, she has a variably supportive ex and children, and we're afraid she might get suicidal over the prospect of losing her home etc. and we're looking to get all the money together for her that we can, but our resources aren't all that great. One of the benefits of that organized religion thing is it's easier to network in distant places. So if I have her name and hospital, he could network with the appropriate places down in Mississippi to bring her stuff/money -- in which case maybe I should warn him that
1) she's trans but not out,
2) it is Mississippi so she's not out,
3) she was already driven away from God by Christians hating on her for her transness,
4) if Nova experiences so much as a drive-by snub as a result of my pastor's networking, most of an internet BBS will hate my pastor forever and I probably won't be looked upon kindly either.

But that could be useful information for getting more charitable types involved. I dunno, what do you think?

It's also possible that he can just send some of the pastor's discretionary funds -- in which case he'd still need name and hospital to verify the situation, and a target account for the funds to go into. I'd still want to let him know that she's trans, in case he has a chance to network with Mississippi during the week. It's possible anyone visiting Nova might overhear a doctor or nurse talking about it or something, so you don't want to send the wrong people. I dunno, it shouldn't be a factor that she's trans anymore than what color hair she has, but . . . I guess I'd feel manipulative by holding that information away from him, when because of her environment it's potentially important for him to know. If he's the expert, he should be getting all the relevant information I can give him, that sort of thing, right?

I think that's a great idea. If he can't help directly, he's probably more experienced about finding out who can.

Unless I completely misunderstand, however, Nova is very much out, even though she's in Mississippi, and no-one has been able to drive her from God, be they mean-spirited Christians or well-meaning, gentle-souled atheists like myself. But (4a) is very much accurate. (4b) is nothing to worry about; you can just help us go 4chan on your pastor's sorry ass if he hurts Nova.

Got a message from one of Nova's friends who lives in the area. I'm very hopeful about what she has to say. I've edited it to protect privacy, but otherwise, this is the complete message:

I am very encouraged by what she says in this message. That there is somebody local, who cares about both Nova and the wife, and is actively working on establishing a mechanism for people to donate is really fantastic.

Then that's the way to go. We should wait for the account to be set up. In the meantime, once Nova is out of the ICU, we should see if we can mail small things (toiletries, boxed food, etc) so the wife doesn't have to worry about shopping for essentials. Can that be done?

Amazon sells damned near everything, and anyone who's a Prime member (like me) can have goods shipped to Nova's family in two days for free (assuming that UPS/Fed Ex goes there).

Excellent. I have Prime as well. But it's up to the wife to give out an address. If someone can find out, that'd be awesome.

That's excellent news. Thanks, gul!

Okay, the gofundme page is a good idea, because other than that I was going to suggest a Western Union money transfer or something similar.

Also, some of our legal experts might help by doing the legwork on (A) Workers Comp regs in Mississippi and (B) SS Disability.

If this were CA I'd recommend she immediately retain a workers comp applicant attorney. They work on contingency. In CA contingency for applicant attorneys are capped at 12-15%. Far lower than the 33% for normal tort or contract cases.

The mere size of novas potential payment should be enough to get an attorney retained.

This is one area where we absolutely need somebody knowledgeable with local laws. Its possible that the mass of paperwork Nova's family had to sign when they got to the hospital was a right to sue waiver in exchange for coverage by workman's comp. The family should be talking to an attorney anyway, since the lawyer will be able to do delaying tactics to stop the bill collectors. There's most likely a legal aide society that'll do the work for free, and can recommend if the family needs to get a workman's comp lawyer.

http://www.glplawfirm.com/Practice-Areas/Workplace-Accidents/Workers-Compensation-FAQ.shtml

This is probably a standard offer ofWCservices.

If I might make a suggestion (I'd do it myself, but I can't do a sticky thread in this forum), let's break out a separate thread to discuss donations to Nova and her family. There's clearly a number of issues which have to be gone over (by us, it seems, since her family is probably not competent enough to handle it without lots of help), and finances is something that's too important to get buried in other items of discussion (such as Nova's health, if her family's able to get around to see her, legal matters, etc.) and we can do a few things now to help her and her family, while the other issues (legal, physical therapy, etc.) are something that will be ongoing and may require more specific help than simply sending money Nova's way.

^Excellent idea. First priority, I'd think, would be setting up the gofundme account if that's the way we're going with this.

Oh, good. I'd gotten a different impression. That should be no worry, then. I was envisioning, well, some wacky sitcom antics without the wackiness if the Wrong Information happened to get to the Wrong People, and Nova's in a bad enough position as it is.

gofundme.com charges 7.9% + .30 per transaction. This seems to be as low or lower than some other sites.

I've been frustrated finding charitable organizations that would be interested in medical bills for a poor adult in MS, but my searchfu is rusty. Still, maybe these people would be interested in donating/fundraising. (For all I know, they know Nova already.)

Maybe check out YouCaring.com... I think there's a site out there, possibly that one, that is run by a nonprofit and invites donations on top of the amount in order to fund its operations, rather than automatically taking a percentage.