rather than spam up the place with the latest one liner gone wild featuring vanity options jsut come up with one or two of your own for whomever... like, Federal Farmer will probably wind up on a milk carton after the crossing guard leaves town.
Spaceturkey died in a catastrophic event involving an 8 foot Lego tower. He was found with copious amounts of THC still in his system.
Unlikely. Poisoned eclair, possibly. But I rarely bother with desserts. Poisoned bottle of Chardonnay or Pinot Grigio, better. Poisoned Scotch, superb - the taste would mask even the strongest toxin. Plus, I die drinking Scotch and I'll assume it's my own choice. It's why I guzzle the stuff. If I think you've poisoned me, I'll claw myself out of the grave. And raid a store for Scotch.
Only if you die first, or you'll be there pointing and laughing in lieu of anything more productive. If you DO die first, D will die eating the anchovies.
Fakes death because he’s a soldier of fortune on the run from the government over a crime he didn’t commit.
Makes three posts in the thread in an attempt to make the thread about himself, thereby turning the board software into a super AI that turns against him and changes his high school grades to Fs, and so he dies in a gutter somewhere with a Joe Rogan podcast playing on his Zune over his dollar store earbuds.