I realize I've been a Bad Moderator and a Bad Mommy by being absent from the pre-new-server Writing forum for months and months. With the advent of the new server, I'm going to try to do better. Instead of nattering on and on about the general process of finding an agent and getting published, however, this time I'd like to just be accessible for any questions you might have that I can answer. Now, here's the proviso: What I know is based on my own experience over a quarter of a century in the business, and what I've learned from other midlist writers over those same years, with an occasional bit of data from outside sources (the Authors Guild, etc.). If I don't know the answer, I'll tell you I don't know. If I do have an answer to your question, understand that it's an answer from my POV, and another writer might easily have an entirely different take on the subject. (Also, as my title says, I'm a novelist. That's what I write, that's what I've sold. I know next to nothing about the scriptwriting business and, while I've written short stories, I've never succeeded in selling one. So those questions I can't answer, but both actormike and reno floyd are good sources for scriptwriting questions.) Lastly, please don't ask me to read every post in every thread in this forum. (Oh, I know, you don't expect me to do that, but could I please, please, please read your story? ) I can't, really. At least not until I win the lottery and can retire from my Day Jobs. That said, ask away!
What are some killer mistakes that a lot of writers make in trying to sell their first *ahem* novel? That is, what's a sure way to get a rejection slip from the publisher?
The first few things that come to mind are: 1. Trying to pitch a manuscript "over the transom" (that is, without having an agent), even after the publishing company specifically says it will not accept "unsolicited manuscripts." (Easiest way to avoid this is to subscribe to Writer's Market and find out exactly what the publisher you're aiming for is looking for. IOW, do your homework.) 2. Having a book published by a vanity press and bragging about it. A vanity press (which is different from a print-on-demand publisher, for which I'd need a separate explanation) is one of those guys like Vantage Press that advertise in the back of magazines "Publish Your Book in Only 30 Days!" You pay them to print x-number of copies of your book, which they dump on you, unedited, un-proofread, and expect you to sell. Nothing screams AMATEUR like going with a vanity press. So if you've made that mistake, don't ever, ever tell a NY book editor that you have. 3. Know what the publishing company is looking for. Don't try to send a s/f novel to someone who only publishes romances, for example. 4. Don't send the entire manuscript. First send a query letter. Then if you get a positive response from an editor, send three chapters and an outline. Yes, it's a good idea to have the entire manuscript written the first time around, but three chapters and an outline are all an editor's going to read from a newbie, if that. 5. Don't pester the editor once s/he's got your manuscript. Used to be as a professional courtesy you'd get a response in under six weeks. Nowadays, if they get back to you in under six months, it's a miracle. But repeated phone calls/emails are going to make them even crankier than they already are. So while it's smart to include a self-addressed postcard with the ms. so the editorial assistant can send it back to you saying "yes, we've received your ms." or, barring that, ONE call or email to verify receipt is kosher, calling every week is going to end up with your manuscript flung back in your face. 6. Unless an editor accepts electronic submissions, send your manuscript as an UNbound document, printed on white paper (don't get silly), double-spaced, 1" margins all around, and preferably in a Courier (NOT freakin' Times New Roman) font. If you send something in a Barnum font on sky-blue paper, spiral bound, it's gonna end up in the trash. And even if you're sending an electronic submission: MSWord, double-spaced, Courier 11- or 12-pitch. You're aiming for 250 words per page. Again, bottom line, do your homework. Writer's Market tells you which publishers are looking for what. It tells you how to write a query letter. Also, please, please spell-check anything before you send it out and, when in doubt, pay someone to proofread your stuff beforehand. (Hint: I can recommend someone! )
How did you know it's one of my favorite DS9 episodes? In fact, it's one of my all-time favorite STAR TREK episodes. In fact, I'd say it transcends the medium and is a brilliant piece of drama all around. Why? Because it sends a message: These are the expediencies of war. These are the things good men have to do in order to survive in bad situations. It left the viewer with the sense that Sisko would have to come to terms with the consequences of what he'd done for a very long time. It stretched the characters, it stretched the actors. It worked off the strengths of characters and actors (Brooks is the rare actor who can act straight into the camera), and the synergy between Brooks and Robinson (not to mention the wonderful actor whose name escapes me who played Vreenak) was marvelous to behold. It also highlighted the profound difference in mindset between human and Cardassian. Something contemporary Earth leaders should study when trying to Americanize peoples who don't want to be Americanized. (Sorry, had to inject a little bit of politics in there. ) Kick-ass scripting. (I understand Ron Moore did an uncredited rewrite. IMO, Ron Moore is one of the best things to happen to Star Trek, and I'm sorry B&B exiled him. Whether he did in fact work on this or not, Michael Taylor is Jeri Taylor's son and, nepotism aside, it's clear the apple didn't fall too far from the tree.) And Romulans. What's not to like about Romulans? In fact, I can't think of anything I didn't like about the episode. Space opera at its finest. Makes you think about it long after you've watched it, which is what good drama is all about.
To garamet. My dad (as a kind of hobby) is writing a novel, which is basically a dramtised account of his experiences at university. He's taking creative writing classes... and though I wish him well, what chance do you think he's got of ever selling copies based on that premise?
In the U.S., not a snowball's chance. UK publishers are, I think, a bit more open to intimate real-life based novels that don't have to include dinousaurs, demons or double-agents. In that case, it would depend on how appealing his characters are (can readers relate to them either by saying "Yes, that could be me" or "God, I'm so glad that's not me"?), and how good a stylist he is. Then again, I've never read a British novelist who wasn't simply brilliant with words, so let's assume he'd have that brought out by the writing course. I also don't know what the "rules" are in the UK in terms of whether one needs an agent or can hawk the goods oneself. I imagine there must be an equivalent to Writer's Market that could tell you. In any event, I wish him well, hope he's enjoying the process, and hope you'll keep me apprised of how he's doing.
Are they? (Sorry, that's the proofreader talking.) They certainly give the appearance of being homophobic, at least in terms of policy-making. If you asked Bush, he'd probably say "some of my best friends are gay." If you asked Ashcroft, he'd probably say "I do not now know, nor have I ever met, a gay person." This is consistent with their religious upbringing, though I suspect Bush's Mommy also told him he must always be kind to those poor unfortunate queer people. Ashcroft's Mommy probably beat him black and blue after she caught him jerking off when he was 14 and he's been a repressed cross-dresser who steals women's panties off clotheslines ever since. :dry: At least, if I were writing a novel in which there were two characters who resembled Georgie and John, that's how I would portray them. (Seriously, though, when Ashcroft dies, we'll discover that he does have an entire closet full of size XXL women's clothes and a whole array of blushers and lipsticks customized for his skin tones.)
Children's books Hey, I live in Canada and I recently wrote a children's book for one of my art classes which I"m very proud of. Do you have any advice for how I can try to get it published? Are there different rules for if you want to publish a children's book? Do I still need an agent? Also, how do you make sure that the publisher doesn't steal your idea?
*Opens mouth to give some delibarately bad advice for comic effect, but thinks better of it, and sits back down*
^*pats Diacanu on the head* Good puppy! An idea cannot be stolen. There isn't a concept any of us can think of that hasn't been done countless times since the first caveman began those paintings in Lascaux. What I think you're asking is whether or not a publisher would steal your characters and their situations (and, in the case of a children's book, your illustrations) and publish your book under someone else's name. They wouldn't. It wouldn't make any sense. As soon as you became aware of the existence of the book, you'd file a lawsuit. The author's royalty is 10% or less of the price of the book. The publishing company makes multiple times more money than you do; it's not worth it to them to co-opt your material and risk a lot of adverse publicity. Having said that, the best advice I can give you vis-a-vis selling a children's book is the same as for any other kind of fiction...go to Writer's Market. Children's book publishing is a specialized field. Not every major publisher has a children's book line, and those that do have very specific guidelines for acceptance. Writer's Market can help you there. Go for it!
^Which reminds me... Another mistake many new writers make is to either actually copyright their manuscript before sending it out, or at least put one of those little copyright marks (you know the one I mean; it's a "c" with a circle around it; can't seem to duplicate it here) next to the title to make it look as if they have copyrighted it. Don't do that. It's another thing that screams "Amateur Hour!" If a publisher buys your manuscript, they will apply for the copyright for you. The copyright will be in your name (unless you're writing a tie-in work, like the Star Trek novels, in which case the copyright belongs to the franchise, in this case Paramount), but it's the publisher's job to take care of that.
So, if there's one answer-for-all-seasons here, ladies and gentlemen -- and dearest moderator -- what would it be?
^(A) a sad and lonely man who could benefit from dropping the pose and interacting with others on a more human level (B) no idea, but my money's on Cassandra. "What's inside the box is more important than the wrapping outside"? IOW, your writing is what is or isn't going to get an editor's attention, so it's best not to distract or annoy them (most of them are simple folk) by not following the standards for submission they've established over the decades. Breaking in to writing is tricky, because there are no set rules. If you want to be a doctor or a lawyer when you grow up, you know you have to go to med school or law school, pass the boards or the bar, etc. There's no specific degree program for being a writer. There's no employment agency or entry level position that will guarantee you publication. But, regardless of what you want to write, there are guidelines to follow if you want to be taken seriously. And those guidelines are found in various places, but in my observation Writer's Market gives you the bestest and the mostest.
^Go somewhere where it's below freezing and sleep outside every night. Wrap yourself up thoroughly so you don't get frostbite, but make sure your lungs are getting plenty of really cold air for 6-12 weeks. It was the only thing that worked in the 19th century and, given the growing number of resistant strains in the 21st, may be the only recourse sometime in the future. True story: I had a great aunt who for reasons no one remembers was in England just before WWI. She was 17 at the time. My guess is she'd gone over there from Newfoundland, where she was born, looking for work, probably as a domestic, though why she couldn't have just gone down to the States is beyond me. But you'd have to know that side of my family for this story to make sense. Anyway, poor little Mary, in the first bloom of youth, was stricken with TB at the age of 17 and sent home to die just as the war was starting. Being a poor Irish girl, of course, she traveled in steerage, no doubt infecting half the other poor folk on the ship. But... The ship she was on was British registry, and it was torpedoed and sunk by a German vessel. My Great-aunt Mary and the other survivors spent two nights in open lifeboats before they were rescued. By the time she got home to Newfoundland, her TB was completely gone. She lived another 70 years. True story.
Archer came back from the future and gave her the cure. The captain of that ship (who was Rikimikimakitakian, and don't bother asking why you've never heard of them BEFORE now) was quite pleased. Sorry. Carry on.
I should head Trek. I'd make it a cross between Galaxy Quest and an even dirtier Tripping The Rift. You'd love it.
I have a question. Did you (garamet, obviously) read any of the entries in the "liberty" contest last year? And if so, what did you think?
Can I ask something about one of your books? I just read Probe and I was wondering why you had someone say Beethoven is "the one Earth composer Vulcans seem to find the most simpatico." That seemed like an odd choice to me, since Beethoven's music is so emotional.
Lanzman, no, sorry. I was really crunched at the time, and figured if I couldn't read all of them, it wouldn't be fair to just read some. (Howsomever, I do remember that you won.) Diacanu, I'd have to vote for Puck. His butternut squash soup is to die for. Astaroth, while it's true that Beethoven sounds emotional, structurally his music is very logical. I thought it was fitting that Vulcans, who really are very emotional under that facade (or they wouldn't have to work so hard at repressing their emotions), would find him fascinating. BTW, have you read Music of the Spheres?
Thanks! Makes perfect sense. Do you mean this? I might have to look into it. I have a special interest in Pythagoras.
