NEWSFLASH: Bert and Ernie are NOT gay

And they will not be getting married. Just two straight puppets living together. Nothing too see here.

Actually, I think both of them are into beastiality. Bert, of course, is into pigeons and Ernie is into duckies.

All I'm saying is type "Bert ernie backdoor sex offender" into Google and hit "I feel lucky".

Kermit posed for goatse pics.

Any straight male who says they wouldn't do Miss Piggy is a liar.

Is Kermit the only character who ever crossed over between the Muppetverse and the Sesame Street-verse?

I was saddest when I figured out that C3PO and R2D2 were homobots.

They do make me smile they're so gay.

I think Big Bird was in one or more of the Muppet movies

I assume this applies only to Sesame Street, since Kermit and Miss Piggy's sexual inclinations are pretty obvious (well, Piggy's are, anyway; I suppose Kermit's terror at the thought could be an indication of being gay or asexual).

And don't forget Gonzo, the ... poultrysexual?

AHHHHNIMAHL!!!!!!!

Elmo is definitely gay.

Actually, Bert seems to be into tall, Middle Eastern types.

They both let humans put hands/fists up their asses.

Am I going to have to be the one to point it out? Have we not been told that marriage is for those who procreate?

Muppets do not bear offspring! Thus, NONE may marry damnit!!!!

Bert and Ernie are like many victimized by the gay community: confused.

Of course they're not gay. Have you seen how they dress?