Parents need to ask babies for consent...

... before changing their diapers, according to Deanne Carson - who describes herself on Twitter as a "sexuality educator, speaker and author".

Source Article Here

Does she have a valid point, or is this an example of a loony tune being extreme?

strikes me as the latter.

I mean, if babies can't talk, how can they give consent?

alternately, "she gurgled in the affirmative" isn't a defense.

Loony tune. You don't ask a three year old if they want or don't want something, you don't give them a choice. Not like they can even really give you an answer

Liberals are going to destroy this planet

Does she have children? I doubt it. It's the eye contact and the tone of voice that's important to an infant, not the words.

She's nuttier than a fruitcake. Teaching consent is important. A child should know that he or she has a right to their own bodily autonomy to an extent. For example, a 5 year old has a right to say no to kisses and hugs from Grandma, but mom still gets to tell her she has to eat dinner, and go to bed. As they get older, kids get a little bit more leniency, so that by the time they're adults, they've developed a comprehensive understanding of what is and isn't allowed via consent.

"No!" is a two-year-old's favorite word. Long before they're three (three is actually a more peaceful time), they're learning to differentiate themselves from the Big People, and the way to do that is to yell "NOOOOOO!" at the top of your lungs.

By the time they're three, they realize that yelling "NOOOOO!" when you ask them "Do you want to go for ice cream?" can be counterproductive.

Consent is obviously overboard, but I do think information is super important.

With both my children, if I need to pay extra attention to their genitals I talk to them about it. "Okay, so you have poop on your testicles. I'm going to use a wet wipe to clean them off. Remember that only me, Mommy, your teacher or a doctor should be touching your genitals, and it should only be to clean you up or test if you are sick. And if it ever feels wrong, talk to me or Mommy."

Is that long winded and probably unnecessary? Yeah, probably. Is it annoying to have to do it ALL THE TIME (seriously, poop shoot is in the back, how does it so easily move forward?!?!) Yeah, I think so.

But I also didn't think that my wife was molested as a small child until she told me, so what do I know? It's not like it hurts to talk to my kids, and with all we know now about abuse it actually probably is useful.

information I could have used at my trial Perry Mason!

why stop at just diaper changes? Maybe I should ask my grand daughter if I should itemize or take the standard deduction on my taxes!

Looking at her, one doesn't jump to the conclusion that she has reasonable, well thought out ideas.

With a three year old... that can be a bit of an uncomfortable and slightly awkward conversation.

With a thirteen year old... weird as fuck.

Nice work on the child rearing !

[Good luck with the therapy.]

TMI dude, TMI.

Talking to them and explaining what is happening gives them an idea about conversation and speaking, and for that I have said those things but I would not say it is about permission. Child is getting their diaper change no matter what, but it seems soothing. To put it in the realm of actually asking an infant or toddler for permission gives them the wrong idea about parental authority if you ask me. They need to understand they do not get to make some decisions or you will have a spoiled nightmare.

This is the logical extreme of the "We shouldn't force kids to kiss Grandma" trend. It doesn't make any practical sense. If you give your kid the impression that being free of feces-soaked undergarments is optional, they're going to have a very rough life.

Gotta mention some ultra-liberal friends who raised their two kids ultra-liberally. Now at 24, their daughter is gay* dresses all in black, and has a turquoise buzz-cut. At 22, their son's brain has been fried by a late-teens drug binge - he's barely socially functional, and goes on rants how no one else is real and he's in the matrix. Both are tattooed and both smoke. Their mother, meanwhile, was crying to us "I guess I'll never have grandchildren."

*(Only mentioned because of the grandmother comment later)

When I was a kid, my grandmother's neighbors were raising their own hellspawn in the ultraliberal manner. Little boy was maybe four or five and was an unholy terror. Screaming, grabbing stuff, running around, breaking things . . . ugh. Hate to think how that kid wound up as an adult.

This idea that so called strict raising of kids is somehow going to keep them from being terrible adults neglects the reality it doesn't. About the only think parents who beat their children do is stay at home more often meaning we see their ill behaved brats less.they still grow up to do drugs, commit crimes, and be socially inept just like the liberally raised ones despite the anecdotal stories about liberal raised children.

"Permissive" is not necessarily "liberal" (though I love how some of you conflate the two). There are many reasons for letting kids run wild; parental indifference is chief among them. "Hey, shut up out there! And bring me another beer!"

Link

Apropos #5, there's a new buzz-phrase called "free-range parenting," i.e., letting the kids play outside and make up their own games, letting them walk to the store/school if it's within half a mile, etc.

Some "experts" like the one in the OP seem to think this is a new idea.

That reminds me of two kids I encountered in a waiting room once. Utterly out of control, running around, bothering everyone, bouncing on the furniture. When their mother asked them to please sit down and stop (without looking up from her magazine), the little girl leaned into her mother's face, stared her down and said "I. don't. HAVE. to." and continued as before.
I would have simply been killed for that.

Again, that's called Bad Parenting. It knows no political affiliation. You could just as easily cite examples of mothers smacking the shit out of their kids in the supermarket and automatically decide they were Republicans.

Can't speak for the others, but I wasn't using "liberal" in a political sense. Liberal as in maximum autonomy/minimal discipline.

Given how loaded the term has become, I'd recommend some other adjective.

They’re horrible people. Says I as I sit at the park watching my kids play.

Which is almost verbatim what she said.

Except for the "asking permission" part.

Hold that thought. I need to go sexually assault my son by which I mean put a diaper on him for nap and not give a shit what his opinion is on the matter.

That's what the journalist wrote, not what she said. What she said was that eye contact and voice was important, as well as leaving a moment for the child to recognize that their reaction is recognized.

Now I don't have kids, I have never changed a kid's diapers, and I honestly don't know whether this expert's advice is at all sensible, but I do see that what she said and what they made it look as if she said it are two very different things.