It is 2:05am. I am staring at the computer, after attempting to sleep an hour ago. What do you do when you can't sleep?
Can't remember where I got this from but it's worth a try - Get comfortable Close your eyes Imagine a giant chalkboard Imagine yourself writing the number 100 on the chalkboard Erase the 100 with a giant eraser Write 99 ... The idea is that both sides of your brain will be occupied, you'll be distracted and fall asleep. So the more elaborate the details of the chalkboard the better, and if counting backwards isn't challenging enough, you can count backward by three. It's worked for me a couple of times, usually I don't get past the mid-thirties.
Basically. Not everyone realizes that your breathing slows when you're asleep, and that when you force yourself to do it, that it actually puts you to sleep.
I prescribe one comfortable chair, preferably a recliner, dim the lights and put 2001, A Space Odyssey on the DVD player. You should be sawing logs by the time man discovers tools, god knows I always am.
A few weeks of therapy and a prescription for ativan leading to a year-long dependancey. At least, that worked with me.
I have a couple sleep techniques, depending on the cause of the insomnia: 1) If I've got things on my mind that are troubling me, I'll write them down. I write down what I'm thinking about, what I think about it and why, what possible options I can take, the pros & cons of each option, and the option I think is the best, for example. Usually getting them out of my head lets me get to sleep before I need to go through much writing. 2) Three long, slow, steady inhales/exhales. Then I'll do a self-hypnosis thing (in my head): "I am counting backwards from 10 to 0. When I reach 0 I will be sound asleep and will sleep until the sound of the alarm..." Finally I do a relaxation thing, where I focus on relaxing the muscles in my feet, then my calves, then my thighs...then I do the arms the same way, and finally the scalp and torso. If you do it right your body becomes very warm and almost numb. 3) I masturbate. One of these options or some combination of them usually does the trick.
Not to quibble, but it's diphenhydramine. In addition to Simply Sleep, it's the generic name for Sominex and other OTC sleeping pills. It's also known as Benadryl and Dramamine, which is why that particular class of allergy meds and motion-sickness meds makes people so sleepy. So the usual cautionaries about driving, heavy machinery, blah-blah-blah apply to all of these.
Ideally, you would have already completed some exhausting physical exercise earlier in the evening. Following that, have about 10 beers or 3 stiff drinks, smoke a doobie, then rub one out.
Rubbing one out always causes wide-awakefulness. I am an introvert, but maybe my cock is an extrovert.
Tactfully ignoring all the banging one out suggestions, I have a very warm bath with lavender oil in it and if I'm still not sleepy, a mug of hot milk. Dunno why it works, but it does!
Yes. The trick is to pass out early enough that you still get plenty of uninterrupted sleep. Or to get so drunk that you the bladder pressure alone isn't enough to wake you up.
You don't sleep properly when you've been drinking though. I find that when I can't sleep, the worst thing to do is to try to sleep. Just pretend that you don't give a shit and it'll happen eventually. What's the worst that can happen anyway?
I go to work sleepy and accidentally electrocute myself. One of my buds fell recently asleep behind the wheel and totalled his KIA.
Call The President with one of those early morning "shit hitting the fan" phone calls Hillary was talking about last year about this time!
