I still wouldn't consider any of you old, my grampa is just about the only person I consider old. He's like 86.
So you can't call 'em "Older" either...dude...we get to call every woman "young lady" and not sound patronizing. It is a gift! Use it!
(cues up Queen's "Who Wants To Live Forever" instrumental from "Highlander" for sad mood music) (Wraps blanket around self and leans closer to warm his old bones by the fire) I remember the days when a "computer" was a thing that filled a room and was always trying to take over the world. I remember when TV was three channels and all three were black and white. I remember when Gilligan's Island and Star Trek were NOT reruns and there was always a hope the castaways might get off the frickin' island. I remember watching the Beatles playing live on TV. In black and white. I drove to the theater to see "Star Wars" when it first came out. Just call me Methuselah.
you're not old. You're really not. Not until you're hooked up to all sorts of machines and someone else has to change you and feed you.
Nurse: Okay, Mr. Phantom, it's time for your bath. Phantom: Nurse: Orderly, better bring the stun gun...
I'm not living with machines- the second I can't live on my own, I am done. I'm gonna get one of them no-life-support-agreements with my spouse. When I get a spouse anyway.
Too much possibility for akward wardrobe malfunctions post mortem- bewbies are nice, but not when they are attached to someone who is dead.
Well if it's a horrific accident, more of me might be splattered on the rocks than in the bikini anyway.
Which makes it all the more akward... I went to the "Dead World" show at the Boston Museum of Science and had to leave because I found myself bothered by the fleshless dead boobs and penises. Emphasis on the latter.
I see! Of course! Or I could just play that song "Jump around" and jump in high heels like Catalina on My Name is Earl....
"She wore an itsy-bitsy teeny-weenie yellow polka dot bikini As she fell off the rooftop that night..."
I for one wouldn't mind checking out her chim-chim-chimney chim chim chiree. (writes Jenna's idea down for future use)
If you want you could get one for every date. Then it is a "random" number but with meaning. It's very sentimental. My dad gets my mom a rose for every year they are married on their anniversary. Or at least he used to, that many roses can get kind of expensive.
