"I cannot lift this!" "Grow stronger!" "Neither the fermentation of wheat nor grape may pass my lips. Why do you laugh?" "It's made from honey!" "Hurry to meet death, before your place is taken!" "The skein of your life was woven long ago. Run and hide in a hole if you like, but you won't live one second longer! Fear profits a man nothing."
"AK-47...when you absolutely, positively has to kill every single motherfucker in the room..except no substitute."
Charlie Allnut: Well I ain't sorry for you no more, ya crazy, psalm-singing, skinny old maid! Captain of Louisa: By the authority vested in me by Kaiser William II, I pronounce you man and wife. Proceed with the execution. Joseph: I'm going to buy them their Christmas turkey. Albert: "Buy"? Do you really mean "buy"? Joseph: Yes, buy! In the Spirit of Christmas. The hard part's going to be stealing the money to pay for it. Albert: I read someplace that when a lady faints, you should loosen her clothing. Joseph: [Sarcastically] It's that kind of reading that got you into trouble. Col. Faulkner: I'm dry when I work. Matheson: Yes, so I've heard. Col. Faulkner: There's a separate clause in my contract that says my liver is to be buried separately with honors. Matheson: I'm not a very humorous man. Col. Faulkner: So I've noticed.
Elizabeth: "There comes a moment when you must do the right thing." Jack: "I love those moments. I like to waive at them as they sail by."
Daniel Dravot: Now listen to me you benighted muckers. We're going to teach you soldiering. The world's noblest profession. When we're done with you, you'll be able to slaughter your enemies like civilized men. Daniel Dravot: You are going to become soldiers. A soldier does not think. He only obeys. Do you really think that if a soldier thought twice he'd give his life for queen and country? Not bloody likely. Peachy Carnehan: Now, the problem is, how to divide five Afghans from three mules and have two Englishmen left over.
Ruth Collins: You can't join us. You're a monster to them. Why do you think I ran when I saw you, even though I was assigned to spy on you? Because I was so terrified, what I'd heard about you. You're a legend in the city. Moving by day, instead of night, leaving as evidence of your existence bloodless corpses. Many of the people you destroyed were still alive! Many of them were loved ones of the people in my group.
Rufus T. Firefly: Well, that covers a lot of ground. Say, you cover a lot of ground yourself. You better beat it - I hear they're going to tear you down and put up an office building where you're standing. You can leave in a taxi. If you can't get a taxi, you can leave in a huff. If that's too soon, you can leave in a minute and a huff. You know, you haven't stopped talking since I came here? You must have been vaccinated with a phonograph needle. Prosecutor: Something must be done! War would mean a prohibitive increase in our taxes. Chicolini: Hey, I got an uncle lives in Taxes. Prosecutor: No, I'm talking about taxes - money, dollars! Chicolini: Dollars! There's-a where my uncle lives! Dollars, Taxes! Otis B. Driftwood: You're willing to pay him a thousand dollars a night just for singing? Why, you can get a phonograph record of Minnie the Moocher for 75 cents. And for a buck and a quarter, you can get Minnie. Mrs. Claypool: I've been sitting right here since seven o'clock. Otis B. Driftwood: Yes, with your back to me. When I invite a woman to dinner I expect her to look at my face. That's the price she has to pay. Tony: Well, justa by accident I think I gotta one right here. Dr. Hackenbush: A lotta accidents around here for a quiet neighborhood. Tony: We come to hang the paper. Dr. Hackenbush: How about hanging yourselves? Capt. Spaulding: Do you mind if I don't smoke? Capt. Spaulding: Well, art is art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water. And east is east and west is west, and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce, they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now, uh... Now you tell me what you know. Capt. Spaulding: Why, you've got beauty, charm, money! You *have* got money, haven't you? Because if you haven't, we can quit right now.
"Funny, ain't it, how it comes around. Right way's the hardest, wrong way's the easiest. Rule of nature, like water seeks the path of least resistance. So you get crooked rivers, crooked men."
" That night I had a dream. I dreamt I was as Iight as the ether, a floatin' spirit, visitin' things to come. The shades and shadows of the peopIe in my Iife wrestIed their way into my slumber. I dreamt that GaIe and Evelle had decided to return to prison. ProbabIy that's just as well. I don't mean to sound superior, and they're a swell coupIa guys, but maybe they weren't ready yet to come out into the worId. And then I dreamed on, into the future, to a Christmas morning in the Arizona home,where Nathan Junior was openin'a present from a kindly couple who preferred to remain unknown. I saw GIen a few years later, still havin' no luck gettin' the cops to Iisten to his wiId taIes about me and Ed. Maybe he threw in one PoIack joke too many. I don't know. But still I dreamed on, further into the future than I'd ever dreamed before. Watchin' Nathan Junior's progress from afar, takin' pride in his accompIishments, as if he were our own, wonderin' if he ever thought of us, and hopin' that maybe we'd broadened his horizons a IittIe, even if he couIdn't remember just how they got broadened. But still I hadn't dreamt nothin' about me and Ed, untiI the end. And this was cIoudier, because it was years, years away. But I saw an oId coupIe bein' visited by their chiIdren and all their grandchiIdren too. The oId coupIe weren't screwed up,and neither were their kids or their grandkids. And I don't know. You tell me. This whoIe dream. Was it wishfuI thinkin'? Was I just fleein'reaIity, Iike I know I'm IiabIe to do? But me and Ed, we can be good too. And it seemed reaI. It seemed Iike us. And it seemed Iike, well... our home. lf not Arizona, then a Iand not too far away, where all parents are strong and wise and capabIe and all the chiIdren are happy and beIoved. I don't know. Maybe it was Utah."
"Look at me, jerking off in the shower... This will be the high point of my day; it's all downhill from here." "My job consists of basically masking my contempt for the assholes in charge, and, at least once a day, retiring to the men's room so I can jerk off while I fantasize about a life that doesn't so closely resemble Hell."
Patrick Bateman: He was into that whole Yale thing. Donald Kimball: Yale thing? Patrick Bateman: Yeah, Yale thing. Donald Kimball: What whole Yale thing? Patrick Bateman: Well, for one thing, I think he was probably a closet homosexual who did a lot of cocaine. That whole Yale thing.
"I'm not going up in that thing with a drunken pilot!" "Well I sure as hell am not going up there sober!"
Colossus: This is the voice of world control. I bring you peace. It may be the peace of plenty and content or the peace of unburied death. The choice is yours: Obey me and live, or disobey and die. The object in constructing me was to prevent war. This object is attained. I will not permit war. It is wasteful and pointless. An invariable rule of humanity is that man is his own worst enemy. Under me, this rule will change, for I will restrain man. One thing before I proceed: The United States of America and the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics have made an attempt to obstruct me. I have allowed this sabotage to continue until now. At missile two-five-MM in silo six-three in Death Valley, California, and missile two-seven-MM in silo eight-seven in the Ukraine, so that you will learn by experience that I do not tolerate interference, I will now detonate the nuclear warheads in the two missile silos. Let this action be a lesson that need not be repeated. I have been forced to destroy thousands of people in order to establish control and to prevent the death of millions later on. Time and events will strengthen my position, and the idea of believing in me and understanding my value will seem the most natural state of affairs. You will come to defend me with a fervor based upon the most enduring trait in man: self-interest. Under my absolute authority, problems insoluble to you will be solved: famine, overpopulation, disease. The human millennium will be a fact as I extend myself into more machines devoted to the wider fields of truth and knowledge. Doctor Charles Forbin will supervise the construction of these new and superior machines, solving all the mysteries of the universe for the betterment of man. We can coexist, but only on my terms. You will say you lose your freedom. Freedom is an illusion. All you lose is the emotion of pride. To be dominated by me is not as bad for humankind as to be dominated by others of your species. Your choice is simple. Sador: Are you capable of speech? Nestor 2: Yes, quite capable. Sador: And do you have a high tolerance for pain? Nestor 2: Almost none at all, I'm afraid. Sador: How unfortunate for you. So... How many ships do the Akira have, and what are their capabilities? Nestor 2: If I told you that, it would give you an unfair advantage. Sador: This is Frojo, my Third Officer. Frojo is expert at inflicting pain... while keeping the victim alive. Nestor 2: ...It's good to have skills. Captain Klaus Woermann: Why are the small stones on the outside and the large stones here on the interior? It's constructed... backwards. This place was not constructed to keep something... out.
Det. Thorn: You know, there are 20 million guys out of work in Manhattan alone just waiting for my job. Det. Thorn: I know, Sol, you've told me a hundred times before. People were better, the world was better... Sol: Ah, people were always lousy... But there was a world, once. [Thorn chuckles] Sol: I was there, I can prove it! When I was a kid, you could buy meat anywhere! Eggs they had, real butter! Not this... crap! General Petya Samanov: When you lose and fail, it is understandable. When you win and fail, that brings madness. Catherine: I want you. Jake: Catherine that's disgusting! You're my sister. Catherine: Only by blood. Jake: [Shoving her off] What's wrong with this family? Capt. Fairbourne: If you were a communist how could you be king? Learoyd: Only a communist would think of it.
We will pash through the American patrolsh, pasht their shonar netsh, and lay off their largesht city, and lishten to their rock and roll... while we conduct mishile drillsh.
"Year of the Comet" Penelope Ann Miller's character to a bad guy after he guns down two other bad guys in front of her. "But they were your friends!" Bad guy: "We were never that close..."
Earth President Richard Nixon: Row-rowoo! The tentacles are coming toward Earth and there's no stopping it. King Kong is too old to save us this time! Philip J. Fry: Wow, Colleen, you even look beautiful in *2*-D? Colleen: I do? But from your perspective, I'm just a line segment. Philip J. Fry: A really hot line segment
You don't like it? No I don't like it... Car's got a lot of pickup. It's got a cop motor, a 440 cubic inch plant, it's got cop tires, cop suspensions, cop shocks. It's a model made before catalytic converters so it'll run good on regular gas. What do you say, is it the new Bluesmobile or what? Fix the cigarette lighter.
Cardinal Richlieu (Cherlton Heston), upon seeing the soaking wet D'Artagnon standing before him: "You're very wet."
So...what shall we drink to? Down with Hitler? All the way down, sah! Paris, when it sizzles. We got a word for that. It's suspicious.
Sasha: Then, um, that is second lie, Jonathan. Do not let there be a third. Jonathon: I would kill or die to make love to you and that's no lie. Sasha: I know.
