Premarital sex: it's good for you!

The studies suggest that people who live and fuck together before marriage might have a slightly higher tendency to divorce than those who don't. They don't suggest that this is an across the board type thing and that most marriages like that end up in divorce, you retard. If 19% get a divorce that still leaves 81% who didn't.

It would be nice to be rich and single and have women willing to do it every hour on the hour for like 2 days and just get it all out of your system. Marriage is not like that.

Wow, Dayton's an even bigger dipshit than I realized.

Even if statistical evidence did correlate premarital sex with higher divorce rates, that does not prove causation. The US is a a society where pre-marital sex is at best expected to keep a low profile and at worst regarded as a sinful abomination. Therefore, those who engage in it are the types less interested in rules and social constructs, which is precisely what a marriage is all about. In other words, if you're not interested in conforming to society's expectations and waiting until marriage, then you're automatically less interested in fulfilling the expectation of maintaing the marriage when the going gets tough.

Hell, Dayton's just shown himself to be an even bigger dipshit than I realized Sokar to be.

Going on the Internet, admitting you took a hand to your wife, and then claiming it wasn't a big deal. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

Holy shit, Batman!

Facts are facts. And the higher divorce rate is a fact.

What country do you live in?

Same difference. People that violate the rules of society in one respect will violate in in others.

Morality is not divisible.

Any marriage based on sex is going to end in divorce. Period.

Especially since you never know what is going to happen...what if she becomes ill and can't for awhile? What if he gets erectile dysfunction and there is no easy fix for it?

If sex is the only thing keeping you together, there is no way it's going to last.

It can be an exasperator though...make other problems seem worse and add pressure if sex is bad...but if your relationship is based on many factors it's much easier to get past sexual issues.

Except that I have NEVER claimed that.

I'm saying that just because I slapped my wife 11 years ago does not mean that premarital sex is not immoral today. Always has been. Always will be.

One has nothing to do with the other.

I've been married for nearly 22 years and my wife has never done anything that made me consider (even for a nanosecond) hitting her. And I have a helluva temper (ask around).

I can't relate to that kind of mindset at all.

Wait...11? I knew you 11 years ago!
Eeww...all while you were trolling TNZ you were also a hitter?
I went easy on your goofy ass.

You're a dipshit. That's a fact.

You know...

I am not a proponent of domestic violence in the least, but if this happened 11 years ago and it's never happened again you have to give the guy credit for getting his act together and not turning into a long-term abuser.

I don't think it's right to taunt someone with something like this. Everyone makes mistakes....and this one is a doozy...but once and only once is a mistake and not indicative of a person...his never doing it again speaks more to his character than the single incident.

I have never hit my wife. I never will.

However, her dad slapped her mom early on in their marriage, before children. He never did it again.

This has been something I have struggled with thinking about.

The main reason is that their household is MUCH more peaceful than mine was growing up. My family is intense. We yell. We get dramatic. Hers? They never even raise their voices. In fact, my wife says they never yelled in the house when she was growing up.

So there the hitting once family is docile, and the no hitting family is hostile.

Btw, I told my father in law I know that story.

Just because things appeared more docile doesn't mean they were happier.

No, you said this:

Are you, seriously saying you would rather have your daughter get married a virgin to a guy who hits her than a guy who treats her well but they have sex before marriage?

I don't want my daughter to have sex before marriage nor do I want her husband to ever hit her.

But.

One and only one incident in a decade and a half hardly equals a pattern of immoral behavior prior to marriage.

And by the way this has never been a secret. I admitted it when My Diary thread was over at the TrekBBS years ago. I remember a member named "Lizardlaugh" (a women IIRC) sent me some sympathetic messages hoping things would get worked out.

That said, all of you trying to demonize me should be honest and admit it.

If I was posting "premarital sex is all well and good" then most of you would not give a damn either way about my relationship with my wife now or 11 years ago.

In our society, making any kind of moral value judgements regarding sex seems to be the ultimate taboo.

Actually I recall this from TNZ back in the day, and remember you getting called out then. Damn straight that people now are taking exception to you saying that a consensual expression of feelings is worse than physically abusing someone.

For what it's worth, the Bible says it's ok to beat your wife according to certain laws. But it doesn't say it's ok to sleep around.

Yeah, once in nearly 15 years marks a person as a monster no doubt

You don't recognize the hypocrisy in complaining about the labeling of you when your post was about you asserting your superiority?

It doesn't make you a monster and it doesn't merit everyone's reaction, but it is worrisome that you were capable of hitting your wife. Establishing physical dominance over someone is far worse in my book than sex before marriage.

Hypocrisy is what little Christians are made of.

You can't be a good person without being a hypocrite.

Because a person should always set certain values and standards as their goals even if they are doomed to fall short.

But that doesn't make all hypocrites good people.

Of course divorce exists, in both paths of life, it being slightly more prevalent in one than the other. Who cares? It isn't a competition.

What I take issue with is your stance that I must be mistaken that I know people who engaged in premarital sex who are in a happy, fulfilling marriage, like they don't exist or something. You couldn't be more wrong, or judgemental for that matter.

I think people who didn't have sex before marriage have just as much potential to be happy within their marriages and don't cast sweeping judgements over them, meanwhile you've just gone off the deep end saying things that exist don't, while inexplicably brushing off the fact you're a man that's capable of hitting the woman he apparently loves.

I feel that all these issues are tied up around the archaic concept of ownership of women. Fundamental Christianity and Islam are very similar in this respect.

Physical violence against women. Ostracization of women who have had sex outside of marriage. Controlling a woman's reproductive functions. Controlling a woman's appearance. It is all about men dominating women.

I have no doubt that the fundamentalist evangelicals would, if given the chance, turn our society into one resembling Iran or Afghanistan.

My god, man. I'm having difficulty in deciding whether to be amused or disgusted. It's like Thunderdome, Dayton.

The guy can have as much credit as those who want to give him it thinks he deserves, regardless, its still a pretty fucking big elephant to be standing in the room.

The whole point of my original post at Dayton when I picked up on the fact he thumped his wife, was (other than the fact he's clearly an arsehole) but how on earth can he even contemplate making moral judgements against everyone else, when he really is the most morally bankrupt, fucked up soul in this thread.

I noticed his rep comment to you claiming everyone else were biggots? Everyone else is happy to live and let live, Dayton however is the one who feels the need to cast judgement over everyone.

This thread has taken a whole turn for the really fucked up.

Immoral? Listen to yourself man. Whats more immoral? Getting a little bit of tail or inflicting physical abuse on the woman who loves you.

I've been unfortunate enough to meet hyper religeous arseholes like you from time to time. You can't see the wood for the tree's. Its your way or the high way and everyone who doesn't agree with you is labelled immoral/biggots etc.

I've always lived in world where Im open to the possibility of a God. If there is someone out there, then people like you really are in for one hell of a shock when your big day comes.