Star Trek: Picard.

Oh, horse shit. For fuck's sake.

Go ahead, explain how I'm wrong.

I'm not even saying it's inherently bad, btw. Not every Star Trek story needs to include a social commentary, and a show named Picard is under no obligation to undermine the title character or to give other characters a chance to shine. (Even Riker could have been replaced by almost any other returning character with only minimal changes to the script.)

Not necessarily. If these commentators are like all the other fanboy commentators, then they're going to insist it's the best thing since sliced bread even if it sucks the donkiest of balls, because it's appealing to their nostalgia. If all you want out of a show is "pew pew pew" and "member when?" then so far Picard season 3 is up your alley, and that's okay, I'm not begrudging people who prefer that kind of content, I'm just saying that these guys will skew their opinions toward that end, and you won't be getting an honest critique so much as a desire to see it as something it isn't in an effort to hold up the illusion that you can go home again.

the treatment of Shaw...

I'll give you the zero social commentary thus far. I'm guessing there will be some as to why Starfleet would apparently let people think rando fall guy was the one behind the tunneling(?) of the Starfleet Recruitment Center and that there will be connection to modern conspiracy theories and/or government shenanigans.

Female characters weak and decorative? I'll disagree. Bev took a level in bad ass. Remember in Q-Pid when she and Troi could barely knock a Q-made dude over the head with a flower pot? Now she's phasering mercenaries left and right. I wouldn't regard the portrayal of Raffi as weak or decorative. Yes, she has to get bailed out by Worf. But she's meant to be portrayed as tough. Seven hasn't been reduced IMO to weak or decorative. The main villain is a woman who doesn't seem either weak or decorative. The only woman that might apply to is "Crash" LaForge.

I would think that a lot of fanboys actually might identify with Shaw. A guy who follows the rules and yet gets undermined by all those around him.

I don't find the writing to be "regressive." But YMMV.

She held her own for a minute, but her biggest contribution to the plot so far is getting badly wounded and calling in Picard to rescue her.

She failed to stop the attack before it occurred. She failed to find out who was behind everything. She got outwitted by a Ferengi. Old man Worf (who used to get his ass kicked by every TNG bad guy ever, including a barrel) had to swoop in and rescue her while killing all the bad guys effortlessly.

You mean Commander Annika Hansen? Because the most empowered thing she's done so far is sneakily change the Titans course while her captain was asleep, a passive-aggressive Bond Girl level of helping out the hero. Seven of Nine, Tertiary Adjunct of Unimatrix 01 would have punched Shaw in the throat for trying to dictate to her how she's to be addressed. Seven would have mutinied the moment he tried to leave two people behind on the edge of Federation space, not pouted and made vague arguments about legacies. She would have pulled some Borg trick out of her ass to get the Titan away from the Shrike. Instead she's just... there.

It's okay when female villains are strong and relevant to the plot, that's how you know they're villains.

Did you know her father is Geordie LaForge, the chief engineer from the Enterprise D and E? Did you know that? Because you're not allowed to forget that for even a second.

If the character was female the actress would be getting death threats. Shaw is basically the Skyler of this show. "Stop doing crimes, Jean Luc!"

"Retro" might be a better term.

I read that John Billingsly interview a while back where the interviewer mentioned the theory that the way Enterprise treated the female characters was a pushback against how Voyager empowered them, and I can't help but see this season so far as pushing back against all the "oh no, women keep making valid criticisms of Picard" complaints from the first two seasons.

Holy Shit!! Was that episode... good?

When Worf was like, "How long has it been since you were in the Great Link?" I literally exclaimed, "Oh shit!"

It was middling for me, even with the reveal. I did enjoy the scenes between Worf and Raffi, though.

Worf has been one of my favorite characters. I am reserving judgment on the more cool, calm and collected version.

I do know that he makes Raffi at least somewhat tolerable, though.

I had subtitles on, so it was an early give away unfortunately.

still...
"I am Worf, Son of Mogh, etc, etc, ...and Slayer of Gowron. Would you like sugar in your chamomile tea?"

I thought the back & forth between Picard & Beverly was well done. Kind of a dick move on Beverly’s part. I had to chuckle a little bit when Beverly jokingly suggested that Jack’s British accent might be hereditary like I did a few weeks ago. But the guy is supposed to be 20 years old. When did he have the time to “study in London?”

Studying in London was their excuse for Brit Carol Marcus in "Into Darkness" too.

Not a terrible episode. Worf was the best part. So now we know the changlings are the bigger baddies in this season, I'm interested to see where this goes and I wonder if they're going to show a CGI Odo.

I mean, he could have been studying in London from age 2 to 18 and still leave 2 years of space hopping with mom.

The dialogue written for Worf was cheesy as fuck - and I loved it.

The revel gives me confidence they are on the right track - it's a lot better than just fighting the one mystery lady and her implausible ship.

In terms of cultivating an accent you really only need, say, up until 8 or 10

No, it wasn't.

It was about as derivative of TWOK as you can get. From hiding in the nebula to the musical cues to some of the dialogue from the Picard/Beverly argument being pretty much ripped right out of the Kirk/Carol "my life that could have been... but wasn't" scene.

Also, Picard was extra twatty this episode. Totally unlikable, actually. Riker should have punched him right in the nose the first time he whined about them fighting a superior enemy.

And the Founders? Really? Fuck that.

The only thing salvageable in this episode was the Worf scenes.

We're on episode three and the Picard train is already starting to wobble violently on the rails.

well, I know folks who came here at 8-12 and still retain noticeable inflections at 50.

I'm gonna go that some sentimental Beverly allowed for toddler Wesley 2.0 to interact with holo-Picard... maybe to read him stories or something? She wanted to at least give him familiarity if not the basis of some bonds with his father before revealing who he was?

"Jack's 10. It's been two Xmas's since the Santa myth was busted," Beverly thought to herself as she knocked at her son's room. "It's time..."

"Jack?" She said, "You know your holo-nanny, uncle Jaloopy? Well, he's based on a real person... (shows him seven seasons of TNG, skips over Insurrection because... ugh!)...so while the Enterprise was in repair we went to Risa for a week, and one thing lead to another...".

Jack, mentally exhausted by this point, slowly turned his head from the viewer

"First: So I have a half (possibly closer) brother who could never impress this man and get his approval who went where???
Good call mum. Computer. Delete character "Jaloopy",

And the Jack accent thing? Holy shit.

The fact that you folks are actually discussing it should tell you exactly how fucking piss-poor this episode was written.

I'd be disappointed if they didn't for any other reason than his family saying "please, don't".

50 quatloos that Worf somehow summons the Defiant (B?), conveniently the transwarpiest ship in the fleet, to rescue their ass from gravimetric freefall or whatever.

that he's 35 playing 19 is a nod to TOS, but that's nowhere as interesting as the accent thing?

although you're right. I'm just pretty stoned

What's the exchange rate on quatloos to the Canadian dollar? Because that's a bet you're going to lose hard.

six blue fruit loops, actually. it's not a direct exchange because silk road or something...

-Riker backseat captaining before the opening credits was rough. Everyone knows how flying into a nebula fucks with your systems and sensors but also makes it easier to hide from enemies. Either Shaw is too stupid to know that and he needs to be relieved, or Riker needs to back off and let him do his job.
-"Send someone to look out the window" wasn't a bad line. Felt like a subtle callback to the Discovery pilot where the Shenzhou uses an ancient telescope when long range sensors aren't working. (War never changes, y'know.)
-Rikers flashback uniform is terrible.
-He had time to count the seconds? That's what he was keeping track of on the way there? Fuckin' weirdo.
-Ha ha! His wife is shrill! Wimminz be complainin', amirite?
-Blue uniform and yellow uniform officers assigned to look out the window. The blue gal is too chatty, the yellow man is professional and concise.
-Why is the conn officer giving updates from engineering? Wouldn't that be Ops? Oh wait, her dad is Geordie LaForge. I almost forgot.
-Aw, Seven's got a little Voyager model. That's nice.
-MY FATHER IS ONE OF THE GREATEST STARFLEET ENGINEERS THAT EVER LIVED
-Hey, your father had friends, his best friend was a sassy robot and he had regular poker buddies. Don't make shit up. He couldn't get laid to save his live for the longest time, but he had friends.
-Pretty ballsy for an ensign to think she needs to give a commander a pep talk.
-Isnt calling her "Commander Seven" like calling me "Captain Ray?" Shouldn't she be "Commander Of Nine?" Or is Seven of Nine a three word first name? Or maybe it's like how everyone called Hillary Clinton "Hillary" despite using every other candidates last name.
-That trill doctor is a stone cold bitch. Yeah, I'm sure tricorders got waaay more complicated in the last twenty years. Ass.
-Why isn't Jack back in a holding cell?
-Bev was pregnant during Nemesis? Goddamn.
-No one noticed the head of Starfleet medical walking around pregnant?
-Goddamn, Bev's a piece of shit. This is some character assassination as bad as they did to Picard in the first season.
-And she still didn't tell him while he was rotting away at this vineyard for a decade completely out of harm's way?
-Wesley's not dead, lady.
-I remember reading about how McFadden complained during the first season of TNG that Wesley was receiving mentorship and advice from everyone EXCEPT his mother, and that was part of she she quit the first time around. I'm reminded of it now watching Riker giving Jack Crusher mentorly advice instead of letting Beverly do it.
-Wait, so Picard has an English accent as a 25th century Frenchman, and Jack has an English accent because he went to school in London?
-Shaw angrily giving Riker command of the Titan and telling him to fix everything is such a fucking cop-out. What captain takes a tumble and walks off the bridge in the middle of a fight telling someone else to handle things?
-And Shaw bled so fucking much after taking a tumble! From the mouth, like a baby! We never saw Picard take a fall like that. Jim Kirk didn't even bleed so shamefully when he died. The TNG people are just made of stronger stuff.
-Wow, these two old men are immediately better at fighting off the Shrike than the guy that personally commanded the Titan for five years. Fuck off.
-Picard is the tactical officer now? Titans actual bridge crew is just gonna watch and jerk off? Sure.
-Worf disarms Raffi? Raffi is less of a fighter than a barrel now?
-Oh, now she's fangirling over him. Great.
-And Worf is bossy and tough while Raffi is weak and pathetic. She's trying to sound sassy but he's clearly the Alpha and she's the Beta.
-I bet she wants to fuck him. His sweet martial arts skills de-lesbianed her in record time.
-Worf is too high profile an individual to be involved in spy stuff anymore.
-Of course the CMO is a dumb idiot whose new technology sucks and only Beverly knows how to save Shaw.
-This is so fucking stupid. Why does the Titan have such a shitty turn rate? It can't fly around a very slowly deployed portal?
-Raffi fails again, Worf saves the day again while cracking jokes. If you weren't on TNG you're garbage!
-Jack is the only person onboard thinking about how the Shrike could be tracking Titan? All these highly trained Starfleet officers never gave it a moments thought? It's up to the kid to be smarter than everyone else and save the day? You can really tell he's Wesley's half brother.
-Seven of Nine can't get past a single security guard and needs Jack to punch him for her? She can't just intimidate the guy into standing aside, or explain why she needs to go?
-Titan has a mole! I knew it.
-How much time has passed during this episode so far? How much sleep did LaForge and the rest of the bridge crew get before they went back on duty?
-Is that a founder? Can you punch a founder so hard that they go gooey for a second?
-Raphaella again? So condescending. Either she's gonna fuck him or he's gonna adopt her.
-Is the boy hallucinating, or is he magical? It would make more sense for Vadic to be after him if he was magical.
-A halfway competent changeling could have escaped those handcuffs and murdered Worf and Raffi in the blink of eye. What is this bullshit?
-ROGUE TERRORIST CHANGELINGS? OH FUCK OFF THEY'VE GOT JEM'HADAR AND VORTA TO FIGHT FOR THEM UGGHHHHHH
-The Founders have a history of using plagues against planets that displease the Dominion. The Federation used a plague to almost wipe out the link. Why didn't these rogue founders just dump a big bucket of plague on Earth and call it a day?
-Shop shooting yourself! Stop shooting yourself! Use the phasers, idiots. You knew she had the portal weapon.
-"Remove yourself from the bridge, you've just killed us all" oh fuck off Riker, no one told you to listen to Picard. That's 100% on you, buddy.
-Launch every shuttle, tractor beam the shuttles, have them tow the Titan away from the gravity well. Easy peasy.
-"Rogue killer changeling" was the plot of one of less memorable Voyager novels, and it was stupid then too.
-You'd think the Dominion would be doing more to deal with the rogue changeling threat from their end, since they'd be more likely to capture them than to kill them like the Federation or Klingons would.

I’ll bet dollars to donuts that the Picard that suggested the attack was the changeling. At least I hope it was.

I developed a vaguely British accent for a bit as a kid just from watching Doctor Who and Are You Being Served regularly.

A Founder once tried to blow up Bajors star with a runabout to take out the Federation and Klingon fleets, and it almost worked until they got caught at the very last second.

Founders don't need to steal other races super weapons to do imaginable damage to their enemies.

Sadly, I'm pretty sure this was the real Picard. And he's become quite an asshole.