Weird Flatmate Advice Needed

Hence the saying, "The early bird gets to smother the freeloader with a plastic grocery bag."

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Have you considered getting a gun and shooting him?

Oh, but it's okay for the deadbeat to crawl on to Delaware's couch and drool on it in his sleep without permission?

Besides, tripping and falling on it would be a more lasting lesson.

Would that have been your advice to the uninvited derelict before he took it upon himself to move into an apartment he pays no part of the rent for?

No, but no one can take advantage of Delaware unless Delaware allows it.

If Delaware can't prevent someone from taking advantage without resorting to thievery, then perhaps he needs to move back home with mommy.

No, to the "uninvited derelict" I would have asked if there was some reason he was crashing here and if it wasn't a good one, I would have asked him to take himself home or pay rent.

You'll stop bitching about America trying to stop being taken advantage of by illegal immigrants then, right??

Oh, and I am so amused given Delaware's stance on illegals of his reaction when he's personally being taken advantage of.

How about it, Cupcake? Tell us how you really feel about your "roommate." Or, if you prefer, your "undocumented" roommate. Tell us all about how he's just looking for a better quality of life. Is he a hard worker?

Make him get up off of that couch and pick tomatos. :bitch:

There is a simple answer. Tell the guy on the couch to go home, or you'll beat him with an aluminum baseball bat, then inform your roomies to cough up their fair share, or you'll poison them.

We've been over this many times before. What you mongoloids are evidently incapable of grasping is that there is a difference between private property and a country. I have no greater claim to a patch of desert in Arizona than does Juan de Tampico, or Vizionrazor, or Abdul al-Rashid. But wait, let me preempt your retarded comeback. The land of a country is held as semi-private property by its citizens, right? Thus "Americans" have claim to a patch of sand in Arizona, but "Mexicans" don't? If that's the case, I give my permission for "Mexicans" to come play. And while we're at it, are we operating on the principle that rent = tax money? Meaning that whoever pays the majority of rent (me, in my situation) gets the greatest say? And conversely, that whoever pays the most in taxes gets the greatest say in state matters? I pay more in taxes than you inbred hillfolk, and the vast majority of corporations and large-scale taxpayers (who pay the vast majority of all taxes, as you scum are well-aware) also agree with me and want to welcome "Mexicans" in. Where exactly do you claim your legitimacy to determine who belongs and doesn't belong on a certain patch of land? If it's not public, nor analogous to a lease/leasee situation, you must have some idea of democratic representation in mind. Majority rules, if most "Americans" want to lock "Mexicans" out, then they have no right to be here? You'll have your work cut out for you if you want to prove that the majority of "Americans" hate "Mexicans." But wait, we have something called a 'republic' to deal with the difficulties of large-scale direct democracy, don't we? Did the voting public select an executive running on the "Get dem job-steelas outta heeer!1!!!" ticket? No, they chose Obama. For better or for worse, that's a barometer of the "American" public's opinion on the subject, and they disagree with you xenophobic morons. So we've established that you're not basing your anti-immigrant sentiments on any defensible theories of country ownership. The fact of the matter is that you base your half-baked anti-immigrant ideologies on your moronic xenophobia. Fuck you all, and fuck your couches.

I still say you should consider shooting him.

I only have the mace gun.

Delicious.

<3?

Try that and give us an after-action report. We'll make some suggestions for you to try.

So, I have a question here. You said you signed a lease, with a realtor.

Now, maybe I'm not clear with the nuances of real estate, but I'm under the impression that a realtor sells homes, not leasing. Are you, in fact, renting a home from a landlord or a realtor affiliated with a realty, or have you in effect, bought this house?

If you've bought the house, ie, you own the title, then the realtor can, for what I understand, fuck off and you can have as many tenants as you want to defray the cost of the mortgage.
If this realtor owns the house, isn't he (or she) in fact the landlord? In which case, the realtor sets up the relevant conditions for leasing the house -- including subletting.

Now, if rental law in California hasn't changed significantly since 1990, you may be fucked if you don't proceed cautiously. Watch the movie Pacific Heights (Michael Keaton, Melanie Griffith), as it touches on this issue. Even though you brought in subletters against your landlord's wishes, they are now tenants; arguably, so is your couch crasher.

Do not touch his shit, do not forcefully remove him. Do encourage him to leave, but you've got to be careful on how you do it (and hopefully, he doesn't know rental laws for California).

The place is owned by an ~80 year old Italian couple. They use the realtor as their proxy because they don't want to be involved.

Unless Delaware and his roommates have an agreement that none of them will have friends over without the others' permission, you really can't make it out to be some kind of home invasion. It sounds like the guy is there legitimately and with permission.

Which brings me to my actual advice, which is: If you bring it up, don't bring it up with him -- bring it up with your roommates. They're the ones you have an arrangement with; they're the ones who live with you; they're the ones you need to talk to about any problems that arise. They are the responsible parties. If they're letting a buddy crash on the couch nonstop and you don't like it, the root of your problem is with them, not with him.

It figures the only time you're amusing is when you're all riled up about having your hypocrisy pointed out.

What the fuck does one have to do with the other?

And, are you honestly saying you thinking stealing from others is something anywhere near acceptable?

Uninvited guests who don't pay their fair share, both.

I was under the impression he was invited - by Delaware's roommates.

The analogy still holds. Greedy and exploitative people are "inviting" illegal aliens. Cupcake's perfectly okay with that, which means that if he's consistent, he'll be perfectly okay with his unwanted couch surfer as well.

Carrying the analogy just a little further, it's quite likely that the businesses who hire illegal aliens over Americans don't give a flying fuck about American laborers; similarly, it would seem likely that Cupcake's roommates brought on another mouth to feed and body to house without any regard for his needs or desires because they don't give a flying fuck about him.

And it doesn't really even make a difference if Delaware's paying room mates invited the freeloader. At the end of the day, it's Delaware who signed the lease, and is therefore legally and financially responsible for the premises. That responsibility could include any damage done to the premesis by the freeloader, and possibly extend to being on-the-hook should the freeloader injure himself while freeloading there.

You're not going to convince me with that arguement. I know illegal aliens who pay taxes - more often than not, more than their share because they don't want anyone looking "too closely".

That seems extremely unlikely. Why would an employer pay them "on the books" for legal, taxable wages when they could get an American citizen with better English fluency and a lower risk of legal entanglements for the same price? Skin thinks you're making it up.

ADDENDUM: To head you off at one particular pass -- before you claim that their employers don't know they're illegals, consider how you'll explain why you do know that.

Of the ones that are paid "on the books", illegals use someone else's tax ID obviously. They pay in taxes, never take out exemptions and don't fill out a tax return.

How do I know that? It's not all that ...'underground' here in Chicagoland. Whether people agree with it or not (and I know people on the left who are against it and people on the right who ... don't care or are in favor of it) it's common knowlege.

And they never collect on the social security/medicare withholding. And they do, in fact, take less pay than legal workers would, because you can get away with paying the illegal workers less than other workers and even less than the minimum wage just so long as the amount of withholding you send on to the government is in accord with the minimum wage.

Can skinofstupid really not know that it's utterly routine for undocumented workers to use fake documents, appear on the books, and be paid less than the minimum wage while doing so? It happens in workplaces with mixed legal/illegal workforces. There was a big example in the news not that long ago: