Catfishing Conman trying to be my brother in law

yeah it all fell apart when he started rapidly shaking his leg, spinning his two cell phones on the table, stuttering and not looking me in the eye.

Maybe after he's done guarding the gold in new guinea for 30(ish) days she will see him again, but its highly unlikely.

Oh, also he was passing through Missouri trying to get up to Iowa Wednesday night, and he was doing 102 in a 55 and highway patrol pulled him over. "I just flashed him my badge and said I need to get to my girl, and he laughed and got back in his patrol car."

I kind of want her to keep it up with him to provide me with continuous amusement.

I make almost that much (before taxes) but I think my wife would get a case of the ass if I had three vehicles to pay off and threw away two grand on a girlfriend every month! This guy has got it goin' ON!

That's what i was telling my wife. 90k without a home or family responsibilities is A LOT of money f0r toys.

Me and my wife make 45k each but we have mortgages and student loans and two kids and car payments.

He paid for everyone's dinner and you bet I ordered the bone in rib eye that was 35.00.

Also, he's come off of the house that cost 900,000 and is now looking at houses for 200k in the burbs here.

So is this guy getting a divorce or your sister-in-law? Will this guy's wife get half of his stuff? Anyway a 200K house is about a 2K a month mortgage - and all those vehicles to pay off? Whatever, but the red flags with his employment really make me wonder......anyway is he a lean, mean fighting machine or a fatty? Reason I'm asking is top-level security is pretty competitive - just sayin'

It's my sister-in-law who is getting divorced he has never had a serious relationship is what he has said he's also very chubby it's not muscle it's a big old gut

Oh and he also says he is a SWAT team instructor on the side for police departments and teaches high speed Pursuit classes

A SWAT team instructor on the side? SWAT teams have senior SWAT team experts teach them. And teaches high speed pursuit? An army guy I knew (Ranger qualified) actually went to getaway driver-school (kind of like high speed pursuit) while he was doing car repo work while in college and he was "the real deal" let me tell you! I've seen him wedge himself between two brick walls in a corner and work his way up to get over three strand concertina wire like he was just taking out the trash or something! He could do that American Ninja years before you ever saw it on TV. So....does this guy look like the type who is pound-for-pound pure bad-ass?

No. If I had to compare him to someone he looks just like Brian posehn

awesome! I guess this woman's "eyeball test" isn't calibrated to reality. That said, Brian looks like about 75 percent of the guys in any Walmart - so what does that tell you? Sorry - no slug is getting through all the training to be working elite security - not with all the competition from ex-military these days.

That was a shit steak if it was only $35.

say whaaaat? I must have low steak standards then. If it's pink and tender and chock full of protein I'm happy.

Here in Iowa we get our beef cheaper than anywhere else

maybe because you are closer to cattle raising country or the corn you grow to feed the cows is plentiful. Wait, do beef cattle eat corn or do they just graze? I know zero about farm animals, only wild animals. Regardless, cheap beef is a cool thing to have.

I was gonna say....$35 sounds about right to me. I'm in Nebraska, though. Lots of cheap beef - no cheap seafood.

I feel your pain. We have one nice seafood restaurant in town and then a bunch of gross Joe's crab shack like chains.

Update from last night my sister-in-law was fired from her job for verbally abusing residents in the nursing home she works in and the boyfriends trip to the gold mine in New Zealand has been postponed

Fucking losers.

I would say cut the boyfriend some slack - who among us hasn't had a high paying New Zealand security job hit a snag or two?

For once I agree. Similar situation with a family member. You can't tell grown people whom they are or aren't allowed to marry. Until the pig introduced me to his brother. Of that I had plenty to say. My family took their side. Even though their daughter was married to a pile of crap, they could do nothing about that. But if I got stuck with an asshole of lesser or equal value, it would take some of the butt hurt out of her garbage can marriage. I never spoke to them again.

I just realized that I can't decide if your avatar is a dog raping a doll or Trumps hair raping a doll.

Are you trying to say your family tried to marry you to your sisters husbands brother?

Good god.

That's Wilfred's re-enactor. He was crying because the other dog was playing with his doll. I came home and found him like that and snapped the photo. And yes to your question. They wanted me to be as unhappy as their daughter.

So today in the ongoing nonsense that is my sister-in-law's life her and the boyfriend came to my in-laws house for Easter (a week late) dinner but he would not come out in the yard because he told her there is a Hitman after him but it's okay because he's got some of his guys securing the perimeter there all in position to intercept the Hitman should he try and murder the boyfriend and all of us

And she believed every word of it. So she believed that this idiot would put her and her two-year-old daughter and her two nieces and nephews and her parents and her two sisters in danger of a hitman that was after this fat ginger who is psychologically controlling her now and telling her that there are hitmen after them

Yeah, but you have to live in Iowa.

So what's the deal with your sister-in-law? Is she going to be loaded after the divorce or something? Why would this guy (who sounds like a pathological liar in any case) be conning her? What's his angle?

No idea. She's gonna have nothing after the divorce. Maybe a few hundred in child support.

They own a 100 year old house thats worth about 50,000 that they paid 70 for

At this point it sounds more like a psychotic delusion than a deliberate con. The whole putting all of you in danger by a hitman thing is best explained if there is a part in him as well as in her that knows none of it is true.

Here's another little andecdote i found out today. turns out he was shot in the kidney, went in the front went out the back and he found Jesus during his recovery.

OMG, said my wife, when did this happen?

I don't remember, he said, it was a few years ago.

Now, granted i've never been shot, but i'm pretty sure i"d remember what fucking day I got shot.

You long ago established that the guy was a pathetic liar. I guess you decided not to go with the advice to ignore them and have nothing to do with these idiots?

I mean, maybe he's been shot multiple times and that was the worst one? Probably still just a pathological liar.

Does he ever admit he was lying even if reluctantly? I really don't want to get into the psychology as trying to do so over the internet is a pig at a poke and so a fool's errand. Still, it would be interesting to see if he knows he is telling lies and just can't stop himself or if there is some other disorder at work.

At the end of the day I would just call him on it, recommend psychotherapy (which he will probably ignore) and then just cut him out of your life. When it comes to unavoidable family events tell the SIL she is welcome but he is not and if it is at someone else's house simply do not attend events where he is present.